Split Sides

A Short Update

Hi guys, today is 3 August. Six years since they broke their promises to me and ran away. This is a short update on what had happened since they broke up with me two years ago. On 23 June they came back to vandalize my chapter (The one titled "To Hayley") with more of their lies and gaslighting and mockery against me. I thought they would've changed a bit since that acrimonious break-up but sadly, they have doubled down on their current status by marrying their therapist. I can only shake my head in disappointment for their actions. I can't believe how far they'll go to erase the time we once had together. I think they do it to spite me, but it is what it is, and I no longer have any bearing on them today. Although I'm sad for how it ended, it was their choice. Nothing more I can do.

That was one thing they did. The other thing, which I did not expect, was to tell me they were in hospital for something, either some sickness or an operation, I forgot. They told me how their new husband loves them better than I could. Then they kept saying everything I felt for them was only on my side and how stupid I was to believe we had something. They continued to rewrite history by casting me as an awful, evil being, and insulting my motives and reasons for being with them in the first place. Calling me a homophobic sex predator and all that. I mean, Jesus, how low can they go? It's tragic to see someone you once loved turn on you like this. Fills your heart with grief, especially with the lack of responsibility or remorse or basic humility.

You know, I don't know why they even bothered to come back if all they were gonna do was insult me and gaslight me some more. From what I can see, they won. They got everything they wanted. They left me and screwed me over for a new man, their friends chose their loyalty to them over their honesty to me, and I'm still recovering from the six years they took from me. They have a new life away from their family, and they're in a much better place in life than I am. What more do they want? More glory? Some more of my suffering? Their utter nerve.

It's incredible, their final insult was to create a custom account on another website to fight me on, using the last four numbers as reference. Those numbers referred to the date we first met, eight years ago. It hurts me to see them like this. To use the date we first met as a trap to lure me to, it's just too much. I didn't take it, I don't want any more of this.

That's what bugs me. If they're in the hospital recovering or getting treated, surely their foremost priority is to rest and get well, or better yet, to reflect on their actions and apologize for all the lies and deceit and manipulation, rather than pile on the attacks and slander against me. It saddens me to see where their priorities are, and even more so what became of them. That's why I decided to erase their messages in that chapter. I don't want them to come back to my present. Not now, not after what they did, not in their current place in life. They haven't done anything to merit more engagement with me, and by abandoning me to near-insanity during the pandemic, they have relegated me to their past. After all they've done, I'm beyond tired of them. They exhaust me, and I want nothing to do with them anymore. I gave them all I had, and I got nothing but heartache and cynicism in return. No more of that. Enough is enough.

I didn't want to leave; they pushed me away and got rid of me. They made their choice, so they must live with it and face the consequences. Every lie they say incurs a debt to the truth. Sooner or later, that debt is paid.

I hope by doing this, I've drawn a line under this whole fiasco. I don't want to keep harping on about this; I've got things to do, and life goes on. As long as they refuse to change their ways, I cannot engage in fruitful discussions with them. And I need more time and distance from them because right now, the hurt and the lingering scars from what they did to me have not been fully healed. It's only been two years since they kicked me out, it's too soon to speak about mending ties. I want them to know that. Until then, I must go through my wilderness years to find a deeper meaning from all of this. I don't know what I'm looking for or how long I intend to be here, but I know I have to survive these trying times. This is an inevitable part of the process and I cannot rush it, I must go through it and see where it leads me. Thanks for reading this, I hope you understand.