Split Sides

Sex Is Boring!

Sex is boring!

There, I've said it.

That's over with, thank God.

I never liked the whole idea

Of sex itself.

I've kept it to myself

For years and years.

Everytime I see it,

Wherever it may be,

I laugh at it

Or jeer at it.

It's overused,

It's expected,

And I'm sick of it.

Why does desire

Have to be defined

By sex?

Who came up with that?

And how am I supposed

To understand it,

I, who only had

A negative concept of it?

Who was never taught it?

And could be dangerous,

Were I to apply it?

It's just kissing,

And taking each other's

Clothes off.

How can that be exciting?

I'd rather see scenes of war

Or pie baking

Than watch sexual nonsense.

Is it possible to have love

Without the need for sex?

If such is true,

Tell me all about it.

This whole idea of sex

Confounds me to no end.