⚠️hurt/comfort/fluff/homophobic tones/death⚠️
STEVES POV
I should've kissed him back that day in the woods.
I should have given in to my desires and returned the energy but I didn't because I was afraid. It was selfish, he was so real about how he felt the whole time I was just in denial but now, I won't ever get to tell him how I felt.
Now here I am, sitting across the way from his casket sitting amongst our friends who survived the Demobats.
I sit here A liar..A wimp.
While Eddie died a hero with being his authentic true self the whole time, not looking for approval. I look around the funeral home to see plenty of people who liked him for him.
"I don't know what happened between you two but... I'd get her back man. Whatever it takes. 'Cause that — that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical-"
Eddie had stopped walking and I also stopped to turn and face him.
"Hey Steve so I've been thinking about stuff" Eddie shyly said and in his true goofy fashion, he twirled his hair in his finger.
"What stuff now? Look, Nancy and I-" I started to say but he stunted my train of thought by placing a firm hand onto my shoulder while looking into my eyes.
"No, I mean do you want her back? What do you truly want Steve? You seem like a man who knows what he wants"
It sounded almost, condescending like there was some underlying thing he wasn't saying. I glanced down at his hand that was on my shoulder and looked back at him.
"I- I don't know I mean she seems so happy with Jonathan and you know, I don't know what I want who knows what they want?" At this point, I was rambling sounding like an idiot and once I trailed off Eddie gave me a look, almost like he felt sorry for me.
"Well think deep down, big boy when you wake up in the morning, do you think of Nancy?"
Before I could even answer, I was side tracked by Eddie kissing me. It was unlike anything I ever felt before, men didn't kiss men around here and shit, did he have cherry chapstick on?
"Eddie" I whispered against his lips and went to push away but he grabbed me.
"Don't deny it" He firmly said, with a tight jaw.
"Eddie- I don't know what you mean"
Eddie stepped back angrily and laughed in an erratic way. "King Steve, always following the rules"
I stood there frozen, in disbelief. I kept replaying this moment over and over again in my head.
"I asked a question...do ya?" Eddie boasted and walked around me to lean up against a tree.
I snapped out of my daydream and saw the funeral was wrapping up soon because multiple people started to pile out of the room. I stood up myself and walked awkwardly up to Eddie's casket stopping just a foot away, gazing my eyes over it.
It was in the shape of a coffin of course, with his band memorabilia across it with various stuffed animals and pictures of him with random people I didn't know.
I wondered why he wanted open casket because he didn't seem like the religious type. Maybe it was his uncle's doing. I looked over him, god it was gut wrenching but he looked peaceful and pale, like a vampire.
Eddie probably liked vampires the good kind, not the ones that killed him or whatever they were.
I leaned down slowly, looking over his nicely groomed hair.
"It was you, it was always you"
