swords men

cant figure myself out

Standing under the water, tharn had his semi long hair, out of its braids to have a hand to the wall to be eyeing down up blink a bit rapidly to eye the water going down the drain to be just lost, he couldn't understand himself at all.
Tharn signed has the water started to turn cold, he then turned it off to then place his hands to his hair to ring it out to then go through the door to go straight to the wall to grab a towel from the rack to then place it about his mid section to slowly go to his bed to sit to the edge to have his elbows to his legs to have his hands cupped together to have them rested to his chin to be looking forward with a hard face.
Why am I like this? Why couldn't I do those things with that girl? Or fine a boy to do those things? Why does it have to be with that duungis? I just don't understand. He is nothing special. Is it because of the taboo? The I know I shouldn't? What is driving me to keep..... Touching him, kissing him? I just don't understand.
Tharn started to breathe heavily to then make a hard face.
I also hurt him, even though I said I wouldn't.
Tharn took in a deep breathe to grit his teeth.
You are going to have to kill him in 2 years, why do I care if I hurt him?
Tharn rolled his eyes to then bend his body a bit to place his hands to his hair to grip to then start to bounce his left foot.
This is not at all okay! I can not keep doing this.
Tharn flexed his jaw and hard has he thought of quitting, it started to piss him off.
Tharn signed to then flop back to place his hands under his head to look to the ceiling.
What am I going to do now? How am I going to get him to come to another "training session"
Tharn darted his eyes about .
We can't be done! What happened tonight..... Felt so...... Good...... It also actually took the pain I have away. When this happens, I'm not thinking, not feeling, I want you to this again, but......I want to go further.....I...... Want to see his.....
Tharn then placed his hands to his eyes to groan.
What is wrong with me? Why do I want to see his dick? Why....... Do I have to have these thoughts? Why do I...... Want to go.... Even further then that? I want...... To see his whole body..... Want to....... Be deep inside of him and.......ugh! I can't I can't I can't! Your father said no sex and.... 
Tharn slowly moved his hands away to tilt his head a bit to the side.
Well...... He said not to have sex with a girl...... I'm too young to have kids...... But a boy cant get pregnant....... So....... Could I...... With him? I honestly don't care about who I lose my virginity with, maybe having rough sex will shut him up! I am so sick of him talking, talking, talking! It's annoyingly cute and....
Tharns eyes widened has he thought about that to slowly move up to place his hands behind himself to shake his head.
What the fuck! He is not cute! Boys can not be cute! He is immature, selfish, a chatter box and a mother fucking prankster that gets on my nerves! All I want is to get revenge and maybe have him down my dick to get him to be silent! That's all!
Tharn started to breathe heavier to then eye down to roll his eyes to flop back to his back to place his hands under his head, he was rather hard at that moment.
Maybe I need to see a doctor, this can't be normal, right? I'm sick, right?
Tharn made a hard face. He was lost and confused, he didn't know what was going on with himself and he honestly didn't have any one to talk to about what he was going through.
Tharn signed and hard to slowly go to his side to make a hard face.
I have to see that boy again..... But how? I bite him...... He is not going to want to see me.
Tharn then raised an eye brow to get slowly up to then go to his phone with an idea in mind.
To his bathroom, type looked to the mirror to have a content swab to the corner of his mouth to be cleaning the area, to then place a circle bandage to it to then place his hands to either side of the sink to then look himself over..
What the Fuck is the matter with you? You take krav maga, karate, so many defensive classes and you can't get this asshole off of you! You want in there with a plan, no touching, no kissing, what happened to that! Why did you allow him to do those things to you!
Type hung his head to groan.
Why....... Why did it have to feel so good?
Type groaned to then leave his bathroom to then go straight to his bed to go to his stomach to grab a pillow to place under his head to almost scream into it, he then rolled to his back to breathe and hard to look over the ceiling.
Why do I seem to lose all my strength when tharn touches me? When he..... Kisses me? Why is he doing that? Is it on purpose? To muddle my thinking? What is his end game huh? To get me thinking about all that and not training and learning more from the other so then we don't kill the other in 2 years? Is that what this is?
Type made a hard face to place two fingers to his bandage.
That's what it has to be. He said he was doing this to get the pain to go away and yet he keeps hurting me.
Type made a hard face to then groan to slowly get up has he heard his phone go off, he then turned his head to look to the night table to then reach for his phone to disconnect it from the charger to then place it near his face to unlock to then widen his eyes to then part his lips at what he read.
What?!!!
Type then flopped to his back to have his phone stay to that one hand to place his other hand to his head to rub has he was very much confused.
Tharn: we are meeting tomorrow, I....... Want too see and......touch your body.