You Only Live Once

CHAPTER 30

It had been only four hours since Mira was back at Potter Manor and yet she had seen only Mia. Everyone else was once again out, doing business for the Order. Mira, while she realised how important what they were doing was even if it was highly dangerous, had hoped that everyone would be there when she arrived so she wouldn't have time to herself. Because her own mind was the worst place for her to be at the moment. Her head was spinning and pounding while everything around her buzzed . Everything was diffferent, everything had changed. Because how could possibly the world still be the same after last night. He hadn't even looked at her this morning, he simply passed by her on his way out of the train with Alecto following him , a smug look on her face. 

Seeing the solemn look on her face Mia had asked her what was wrong as soon as they had gotten home. Mira didn't know the etiquete around telling people someone you weren't with in the first place broke your heart to pieces. So she told Mia that her and Theo had a fight. A defining one. And then she stormed up to her bedroom , leaving no room for further discussion. Mira had heard the front door open and close just ten minutes ago but it didn't sound like they were a lot of people coming in. When no one came up to her room to greet her she decided to busy herself with some Christmas arts and crafts. She gathered everything she needed and spread it on her desk before finally getting to work. She decided to make everyone a custom Christmas card based on things they liked. For example, Remus' would be a chocolate card, Lily's would be a book, Evan's would be a broomstick, Theo's would be a pack of cigarettes. His favourite ones. And she would give it to him. And it would have been funny. And they would both laugh. And he would kiss her. And then-

"I'm quite offended you didn't run down the stairs to greet me, Ro" a voice sounded from her door making her whip her head around.

"James!" she exclaimed, standing from her chair and running to him. James had his arms open and ready for her already so she jumped into them and he spinned her around for a while. When he put her down they hugged once more , trying to calm their breaths.

"What are you making there cousin?" he asked pointing his eyes to the mess Mira's desk had become , while making his way to her bed.

"Oh, this" Mira said trying to clean up the mess she had made in such a short time, before she gave up and sat down on her chair with a sigh. "I'm making you all Christmas cards. And they each have a theme" she explained , turning back to her work , wanting to finish before everyone else arrived. James sat on Mira's bed quietly observing her moves. His mother had told him what Mira had told her and he wanted to find out more. 

"Did you and Nott break up?" he asked after a few minutes of silence.

"You have to be with someone to break up with them" Mira stated not turning her head to look at him. "But in a sense...yes. We did" she confessed cutting a piece of paper and continuing her work like she was having the most casual conversation in the world. James , once again, didn't say anything, he continued to observe her, trying to undersatnd if she was upset by the situation or not. She looked completely normal to him but then again it was Mira. You never knew what she was feeling in the first place. "And anyway I'll have to see him for around six more months and then I'll forget him anyway, so it's not a big deal. I'll manage" she continued, aggresively coloring the card she was making. That statement startled James so much that he practically jumped off the bed .

"You're not staying?"

"I don't think I should" James fell silent for what felt like the hundrenth time that day.

"For fucks sake!" he exclaimed, making Mira turn around to look at him. " I know you're afraid to feel ,Ro! I know it. But what you're doing is selfish! You're running away from your problems instead of fixing them. We're still here. Think about us. You can't come here , make everyone love you and then run away at any minor incovinience!"

"James-"

"Do you remember what Dumbledore said or has it slipped your mind? You'll forget but everyone else will remember!"

The room fell quite once again. James was right of course and Mira knew it, but she couldn't bring herself to admit it.

"Let yourself feel the hearbreak, Ro. We're all here for you. We'll help you. "

"I don't want to feel it Jamie"

"Stay,Ro. Stay and then there will be no lifetime in which we don't know each other" he said , taking long strides towards her and taking a hold of her arms, his voice almost pleading. They just looked at each other for a few seconds before Mira's eyes rapidly started to water until she was fully crying. She didn't understand how but somehow her and James had ended up on her bed , her head on his chest while he was lightly stroking her hair.

"Why does it hurt so much , Jamie? Why can a person make you feel like that? It shouldn't be allowed" she sobbed , trying to gather her thoughts together because they had managed to be all over the place once again. James didn't really know what to respond . Nothing he had to say would actually make her feel any better. So he remained silent, his mind plotting the death of a certain Slytherin , who had the nerve to make his Mira feel like that.
"Is everything alright?" a sweet voice sounded from the door. A voice both James and Mira recognised all too well.
"Lily?" Mira said , slowly lifting her head from James' chest. As soon as Lily saw the tears in her eyes she rushed to her side of the bed . As soon as she was right there next to her Mira practically leaped into her friend's arms . Lily, feeling completely worried about the state she found her you her friend in looked at James , searching for answers.
"They broke up"
"Oh, Rosie. I had no idea"
"How could you ? It happened last night"
The three teenagers ended up all cuddled up on the bed . Sometime later even Sirius joined them ,claiming that he was feeling left out.
"Are you gonna be alright , Ro?" Sirius asked after a while of casual chit-chatting between the friends.
"Always"