I'll Track You Down

Planning

"Dream on." I say stalker closer, who does this man think he is? That I would leave with him just because he might have some valuable information, not to mention we are on opposite sides of this battle, I murder people like him.

Maybe Decker also gave a concussion that resulted in brain loss, that is the only explanation as to why he's saying such idiotic nonsense.

"Kali! You have nothing to lose."

"What about my entire career?!" I spit. "I came from nothing! You know that!" I stomping on his ambition. "I was drunk when we first met! I thought you were different, despite my flirtatious demeanor when I was wasted, the only thing I have left is mostly anger and spite. There are rare moments when I can just let my guard down, because whether I like it or not, I chose this life and there are risks at every turn." I breathe a sigh of frustration. "I have a few people in my life who I haven't hurt by being close to, and I still have to distance myself from them! Because my very existence is a threat to them." I rub my eyes with my hands, and let out a groan. I look down at my boots, I can't believe I just shared all of this with him.

Letting out my feelings is the worst, even if I'm doing it to make him feel guilty. I cross my arms and Caspian takes a step towards me. "Maybe the things I have to lose aren't as important as you think." I whisper. "But that's all I have." It makes me feel ten times worse that he now knows everything I'm going through.

He might use it against me the second I make a wrong move. Either way, if Caspian wants help from me he's going to have to earn my trust.

This is so frustrating, I'm forced to choose between a right choice and a right choice, 'getting information on the Malgrave' that could save countless people, or 'keeping Caspian in his cell' which would also save lots of people.

This only makes my head hurt as I think about it longer.

"Even though I can't exactly understand how you're feeling, I'm sorry." He says under his breath.

"Oh yeah? Well I don't give a shit about your pity." I retort, when I finally look up, Caspians eyes are streaked with guilt.

Good.

I don't even need him, I can do just fine on my own, and who knows maybe he's lying about knowing information on the Malgrave. Deep down I know he must be telling the truth, lying in his situation is risky, but he's done stupider things.

I look at him, then his dislocated shoulder, then his chest with broken ribs. I can only imagine how much it must hurt, but he disguises it well.

"Maybe this was a bad idea I say walking back to the door, I'll leave-"

"No." Caspian says while grabbing my hand.

"No?" I echo, I've had just enough of Caspian acting like an idiot. Isn't he aware of what's at stake? I know for a fact that he is, so why on Earth does he continue to push me to my limits?
"Caspian, I could literally shoot you in the face right now, it is not a good idea to test me, especially right now."

"You could, but you won't." He says smiling.

"What's that supposed to mean?" What the hell does he mean I won't? Of course I will, I hate this man, and everything his life has amounted to. 

"I mean, you wouldn't spare a second thought if it was between me and someone you cared about, but I know that you feel a little more sympathetic to me then when we were at the club."

"I would've shot you then and I can shoot you now." I turn around to face him, while pulling out one of my guns and aiming it at Caspian's head, this man is treading on thin ice, and as of right now I'm holding a pickaxe. I will not hesitate to smash the ground to pieces and watch him fall into the abyss. "And what makes you think I feel sympathetic towards you?" I scoff.

"Perhaps sympathetic was the wrong word, maybe you feel like I can be of use to you now." He smiles again. "You are one hundred percent aware I can help you on this case, but you're just choosing to ignore it so you don't feel guilty about leaving me." I lower my gun, but hold it tightly by my side.

Caspian circles me like a vulture. "I don't understand why you're so hung up about leaving with me, and I've come to realize that it's not even because of your career, but because of your pride." He stops in front of me, knowing he's won. "I know you want to solve this yourself." He puts a hand on my shoulder. "But you can't do it alone, and you know it." I swat his hand off.

"How long do I have to think about it?"

"You already know what you're going to choose and I'm sure you're just biding your time, but I'll give you a day. Because I have places to be and if you can't get back to me I'm going to try my luck at escaping."

"You shouldn't bother, only I can help you get out."

"That's what you think." Caspian retreats back into his bed, and I walk out the door, making sure it's locked behind me.  I walk into the parking lot, the sky looks like it's been covered in black cloth. I take a deep breath out.

"I think that went okay." I say to myself, I still don't trust Caspian, but when tomorrow comes, I know what I'm going to tell him.