We found us | Book 1

Broken trust

Bill:
I'm at the studio with the boys, rehearsing for the upcoming tour.
We leave in two months and I have to say that I'm a little nervous this time.

More nervous then usual. It will be our first time in Asia and I'm not sure how popular we actually are there.

"Okay boys, this was it for today. I see you tomorrow after lunch." David says and I get up from my chair.

I take my phone from the desk and unlock it.
I'm a little surprised that I haven't heard anything from Brenda today and I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing.

I stare at my phone for a few more seconds before I lock the screen again and put it in my bag.

"Ready to go?" Tom asks and I nod as I start walking towards the exit.

When we get home I decided to text Brenda. I don't trust the fact that I didn't hear from her all day.

Bill: Will I see you tonight?

I throw my phone on the kitchen table and look at Tom who is eating leftovers from dinner.

We haven't talked about the whole Brenda thing, but we both know we eventually have to.

When my phone vibrates and the screen lights up, I take it from the table and unlock the screen, opening the text from Brenda.

Brenda: I'll come to your place. We need to talk.

We need to talk? I think to myself. About what?
What does she wanna talk about? Does she know that they know?
Panic starts rushing through my body and I start typing, answering her text.

Bill: About what?

I nervously stare at my phone, but no response from Brenda.

I get more nervous with every minute that passes by.

It's been an hour when she finally walks through the back door.
"Hi," I say with a soft voice and look at her, trying to read her. "what did you wanna talk about?"

"I don't wanna do this anymore." She says while she makes eye contact with me.
"Do what?"
"This. Us. I deserve better than this."

I raise my eyebrows and look at her a little confused.
"Where is this coming from? After everything you did, you just decide that-"

"I was bluffing, Bill." She interrupts me.
"I can't believe you actually thought I would hurt Tom, or even Evi."

"You were bluffing? Are you serious?" Anger is audible in my voice.
"What? You are angry with me?! After everything you did? You are not the victim here, Bill!"

I look at her with wide eyes, a little surprised by her words. I sigh deeply and look away.
"I know I didn't threat you right, I'm sorry."

"I don't need your apologies."Her voice sounds bitter as she says these words.

"You think we can still be friends?"
She shakes her head. "No, we can't be friends." She says firmly and she turns away from me, walking towards the back door again.

"I'm sorry." I whisper, causing her to stop walking. "I'm really sorry."
"Me to." She says, turning her head a little, her eyes lowered.

Evi:
I slam the door behind me and walk towards the living room. "I'm home!" I yell to my mom who is in the kitchen and I walk her way.

"Is dad home?" I ask and lean onto the countertop, watching my mom cutting vegetables.
"He isn't." She says, keeping her eyes on her hands.

"Are you and dad okay?"
They had a huge fight after Christmas day. My dad not being home was the last straw, and it doesn't seem like they are talking to each other at all at the moment.

"We are fine, don't worry about it."
She briefly looks at me with a little smile on her face. "Bill was here for you."
"What did he want?"
"He didn't say. I told him what time you would be home and he left."
I nod. "I'll text him."

I walk upstairs, already typing on my phone.
I put my phone down on my desk and undress myself.

I change into some more comfortable clothes and wait for Bill to answer my text.

Why was he here earlier? He knows we have to be careful until we know how to fix everything. What if Brenda sees him standing in front of my house?

I hear a soft knock on the door and immediately know that it's Bill.
I shake my head, smiling. Is it weird that I know how his knock's sound like?

I open the door and pull him inside.
"Why were you here earlier?" I ask him straight away. "You know we have to be careful, we can't be seen together."

"Brenda broke up with me." He says, talking fast.
I look at him confused, not understanding what he just said.
"She broke up with you? Just like that?"

"I don't know why, but yes."
"Are you sure it's not some kind of trick?"
He shakes his head. "No, I don't think so."

"Why would she suddenly break up with you? I don't understand."
He shrugs his shoulders. "I don't know, and I don't really care."

He comes closer to me, putting his hand on my waist. He puts his other hand on my cheek, softly caressing it with his thumb.

"I'm so sorry for everything that happened." He looks deeply into my eyes as he says these words, pulling me even closer to him.

He leans in closer and puts his lips on mine, softly but firmly.
I kiss him back and run my hand through his hair.

Is it finally over? Can we finally be together again? Is he hiding something else from me? Is there anything else he did not tell me? And the biggest question... can I trust him?

I push this thought away and enjoy his touch, his body close to mine. Oh, how much I missed his touch..

My hands run down his back, until I reach the edge of his shirt. I let my hands slide under his shirt and gently let my fingertips caress his skin.

I grab the edge of his shirt and pull it up a little, helping him out is his shirt before I drop onto the ground next to us.

He pushes me onto to bed. Softly crawling on top of me, kissing me intensely.

The tension in the room is growing, but it isn't the same tension as usual. It's not like how it was before.

Every touch feels different, every kiss feels obliged.

Everything makes it clear that he feels exactly the same way, but we are both to scared to say anything, not wanting to speak the words.

I stop the kiss and open my eyes, softly pushing him of me.

He rolls of me and I get up from the bed, walking over to my desk and letting my hands rest on the wooden tablet.

"What's wrong?" Bill says with a soft voice.
I turn around and look into his eyes.
I shrug my shoulders and cross my arms, hugging myself and gently stroking my own arms.

Bill sits down on the edge of the bed and looks at me.

"I can't stop thinking about you and Brenda." I stammer. Not sure if I did the right thing with saying what I was thinking.
"All I see is you and Brenda, kissing, hugging and-" I stop myself, refusing to finish this sentence.

He lowers his eyes, looking at his hands.
"You think it's easy for me? You had sex with my brother. My twin brother."

He looks at me again and I look at him with a painful face.
"I never would have done that if you told me the truth. Why didn't you tell me the truth?"

"I couldn't!" Bill raises his voice. My eyes fill with tears. "What did you, what could I, I had no choice!" Bill stutters, his eyes glinstering from the tears.

"We could have fixed things, together. It was your choice to lie to me, again." I fire back at him.

"I was protection you! And Tom."

A single tear falls from my eyes, rolling over my cheek.

"How do we fix this? Can we fix this?"