Falling For A Popstar

35

Julie began to go every weekend to gay bars with her friends, and got into a dating app. She started to hook up with multiple random people, wich isn't something she's usually into, but she is at point of her life where she feels like it's time to explore her sexuality.
Men and women almost equally, some were better, some were worse, but something was really clear and that was the fact that none of them was Lana.
Lana was the best person in bed. Like the perfect combination between rough and sweet, incredibly hot and always making you feel comfortable. And of course, finding someone as attractive as her was nearly impossible. If Helen of Troy had been at least half as beautiful as Lana is, the war over her was completely justified.
Not only that, she couldn't get her out of her head sometimes. Everywhere she goes, she sees her. Or hears one of her songs, and sometimes, just wants to cry over it. It's just fucking annoying, but at the same time, she knows it won't be forever, and feels like she can resist. But at the same time, when will it stop? Lana will always be everywhere. What's gonna happen when pictures of her with other people hit the news? Because she dies of jealously every single time she thinks about how many people Lana must be having threesomes almost every day, girls and boys constantly being with her in Julie's head. But she's currently doing pretty much the same, so she can't really complain. Even if she weren't, she still couldn't. After all, she was the one who ended things between them.
But just when Julie started to feel a bit better, Lana dropped Endgame as her second single. And she couldn't stop replaying the lyrics in her head.

I know it’s wrong to resent
I know better than to hate
But when I remember what we lost
I can’t help but to want to yell
At you, at them and at the sky
And I keep trying to get
I keep trying to understand
How could you live us, honey, when we were meant to be endgame?

She cried the first time she heard it. She felt like she couldn't escape from her, as if she were sentenced to suffer. And now for some reason, Julie was convinced that Lana hadn't been the one to out her.