In My Mind

Chapter Thirty Eight - Aria's POV

I walk into the backyard and I see how much work the must have put into it. It's beautiful. Fairy lights hang over a long dining table covered in delicate cutlery. It's magical.
I brush down my dress. I wouldn't let Cara choose what I was gonna wear today. I trusted my fashion judgment today. Well it wasn't really mine. It was my mum's. Cara must've packed it by accident when I left. She kind of just chucked half my bedroom wardrobe in a suitcase.
It's a classy white dress with aqua green lace over the top. It's not like my last green outfit. It's much better. It was created by some fashion designer of mum's. I have silver simple dangling earrings and a nude lipstick and light makeup. My hair is down pinned pack to one side. My shoes kill but the simple white heels were the only thing that matched.
I see Ruby and Cara talking so I head over. All of a sudden they pull into a kiss.
Now I feel awkward. I don't want to interrupt them. Suddenly I choke on my own saliva. I'm an idiot. My cough makes them turn around. It probably sounding like I was clearing my throughly for attention...
"God Aria your ruin every moment we have" Ruby exclaims.
She gives Cara a peck on the cheek and I feel bad immediately.
"I haven't seen you all day, what have you been doing?" Cara ask.
I bite my lip.
"Oh nothing much, you know I've been here and there. We should go inside and greet the guests," I suggest, avoiding her question.
But that's a lie. I saw my mum. I went to a cafe to meet with her. She basically begged me.
"Hello dear," she greeted me. "Lovely to see you."
I knew she was lying. She wore a tight pen skirt and lose pink blouse with too many buttons undone.
"Mum," I replied.
We talked over a very expensive meal. Salad of course. I didn't eat much of that. Eventually she brought up the topic of where I live. I told her politely and she became very angry very quickly.
"You will come with me to London!" She yelled. "I don't care what you say! You can't live with a bunch of common idiots!"
"They aren't idiots!" I spat. "They are family!"
And it was true. She then put down her knife and fork and started up a different touchy subject.
"So," she started. "How's the diet? What was the loss this fortnight?"
I don't call it a diet. I don't eat much at all to be honest... And when I do it doesn't stay down for long... I didn't mention this.
"49 kilos..."
"Only one kilo?" She exclaimed. "Clearly this family isn't strong on healthy eating..."
I cringed. It was the most painful meal I've ever had to endure.
Now I'm here. With friends and family. I should be happy...
But I'm not.
I don't know why. I have everything I need here yet my mind. It's overcrowded with thoughts. But I should be fine. I should be grateful for what I've got...
I bite my lip as I walk into the house it's much tidier than usual. I feel insecure walking into a crowd of people. I feel they stare and judge but they aren't even looking. How can this be? I don't know...
Olivia spots me entering the room.
"Hey, where were you yesterday?" She asks.
She doesn't need me interrupting her conversation with Aiden. No one would really care I was with Danny anyway. No one needs me disturbing tonight. I haven't told her about Lilia and Tyler either. I better just avoid this conversation all together.
"I got to talk to Maddi."
And with that I leave.
I see Danny, Nathan, Maddi and Luke across the room chatting.
I go over and greet them.
"Congratulations!" I say to the beautiful couple. "You look great!"
They truly do. Maddi wears a beautiful classy blue dress and Luke looks great in his suit... I almost feel bad for noticing how good he looks.
"You look great too!" Maddi replies sweetly.
"Thanks," I mumble.
"You really do," Danny says touching my arm.
His hands are so strong and warm... I think I just melted.
"All of you do!" I say gesturing to everyone.
"Excuse me. I'm gonna go see my parents," Maddi says. "They're horrified to be losing their little girl. I wish they would just calm down!"
She laughs and takes Luke with her.
"I must go see Aiden and save him from himself trying to hit on Olivia!" He laughs shyly and runs off.
I think that's the most I've heard him say.
I'm left alone with Danny. He stares at me and smiles. I cover my mouth.
"Is there something in my teeth!?" I exclaim. "Or my hair?!"
I freak out and he laughs.
"No no," Danny touches my arm again. "Your gorgeous."
I blush and look away.
"Wanna dance?" He says.
"But no one else is yet..." I point out. "The music is not even loud and we haven't had dinner. Plus it's really early..."
"Oh well."
He grabs my waist with his strong hands and starts to step side to side. I put my hands and his shoulder and join in laughing.
"I don't normally dance at all."
"Not at the last party I noticed," he winks.
"Oh my gosh," I blush embarrassed. "That's was not my fault. Cara and Aiden..."
"I know I know," Danny laughs with his deep voice. "It was kinda hot anyway."
I look to the floor and I hope to be swallowed by it. I'm so embarrassed.
"Argh," I laugh. "I can't believe you saw that..."
"It's fine," he smiles and looks into my eyes. "No ones perfect although you must be as close as it gets..."
I bite my lip smiling. His eyes are a deep blue and have little specks of green and brown. I slowly get lost into them. My head starts to spin-
"Aria?" He asks. "Did you hear what I said?"
"Oh no," I shake my head. "Sorry."
"I said you come pretty close though."
I blush and suddenly feel very light headed.
"I think I need to sit down..." I fall into his arms and he pulls out a chair.
I sit down and feel so tired that I almost collapse.
"Are you okay?" He asks honesty concerned.
"Yeah," I lie. "Of course. I've been feeling sick all day. I might e coming down with something..."
"I hope not."
"Me too."
"I'll get Cara. She might find you some panadol or something," he turns around.
"No don't," it's too late.
I know Cara is already suspicious of my eating habits. It's not that I can't stop! I jut don't want to... I think...
She races over with a glass of water.
"Are you alright?" She asks.
I nod, "Of course. I think I'm just getting sick."
Cara nods but I see she doesn't believe me.