DISCLAMER: The bold doesn't mean anything in this chapter, its just for effect.
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"(Y/N) are you ok?" a worried voice called out to you. Amid the chaos in your head, his voice brought you solace.
He feared something was up as soon as he spotted you at school, so he tilted his head in expectation of your reply.
He wanted to stay with you, hug you as you tell him your problems, but he only could stay with you till recess ended.
"You can tell me about it" he ran his fingers through your hair. Your gaze was not on him however, it was on your desk. You were trying hard not to burst out into tears.
"(Y/N)..." he started softly but was interrupted by the ringing of the bell. He sighed, not wanting to leave yet.
"you should go..." You spoke softly while leaning away from him.
He gave you a worried look, but there wasn't much he could do at the moment. If the teacher caught him, he would get detention, which would mean he wouldn't be able to see you after school.
"I'll leave for now but.." he bought his lips close to your forehead, planting a soft kiss on it.
"We will talk after school ok?" he gave you a reassuring smile, to which you simply nodded.
When you waved to him, he reluctantly stood up. He gave a sorrowful smile in return and walked away.
"..."
Your gaze turned to a wooden desk nearby. It was empty.
'It was your fault it was empty.'
'It would remain empty.'
'Because the person who sat on that desk, is never coming back.'
Your fingernails scratched the back of your hand as you turned your head away.
'It was all your fault.'
'You had finally gotten close to a person.'
Your fingers didn't stop scratching.
'You hurt them. And now they are gone.'
Your hands were growing red.
'What if... You do the same thing to Cheng Xiaoshi?'
'What if one day he too....'
Blood oozed out of your hands.
'No, that... That can't happen. You would rather die than let that happen.'
The red liquid dripped down to your shoes, staining it crimson.
'Before the chance even comes...'
You stopped, your eyes widened at the thought in your head.
'...I should just end it.'
'If he is never around me, he wouldn't have a chance to get hurt'
As the students started coming in, you hid your hand under the wooden desk.
'Right. This is the best way to make sure... That he remains happy.'
'you will forget me in a few weeks anyway...'
You peered at the basketball court outside your window. The sun's yellow rays striking your face, casting a warm yellow hue on it.
Tears were streaming down your cheeks.
Ironically that thought hurt you more than the pain in your hands.
FUN FACT!!!
1. After this day (Y/N) was often seen scratching her hands whenever she felt overwhelmed.
2. (Y/N) truly believed that this was her only option to keep Cheng Xiaoshi safe, as wrong as it was (Remember they are just in high school, she does not know what's the best thing to do in this situation)
3.Cheng Xiaoshi was worried the whole time he was in class, to the point he considered just walking out of the class to see you.
