𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙎𝙤𝙪𝙡 ♥︎

IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ

Hello everyone.

If you are reading this, then I have come to a decision which I have thought about over and over again throughout the past few months.

All the way from November to this current date, when I started importing this story over to AO3 for extra security alongside the pro of building a second audience.

And... You know, I was rereading some bits from previous chapters as I resized the images and spaced out the paragraphs. While at first I thought it would be a cool way to revisit my story, I was quickly hit with a sharp curve.

I was asking myself questions like: ''Did I really write this?'' and ''How could I afford to be so cringy and edgy?''

Sure, I have improved a lot. Those chapters were necessary for me to develop, though my main struggle is the structure. This story takes one turn, and then another, and then another. 

I feel like I've lost the plot. Or, at least, the details of it. Don't get me wrong, I know what I'm doing, but I just feel... Gone.

This story went from making bad 4th Wall Break jokes and Tokyo Ghoul levels of edginess and bounced up to... Whatever it is now.

I don't care about what I've written in the past, it's done and I should forget about it. But what I do care about is what I am doing right now. What am I even writing?

A story? Sure, that narrows it down a lot, thanks.

But what type? A giddy fanfic? A tragedy? Or...

... I've made a lot of mistakes, okay? And in the past few months, it's been weighing on me a ton. What I could've done and shouldn't have done in the first place.

I could've handled Diesel's death a lot better. Or at least her relationship with the Main Character. I was just so, so blinded by the fact they were practically made for each other, along with my obsession for tragedy, that I lost it.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Remember that cringy 'ark' chapter? I know I've tried my hand to rewrite it and make it at least a bit more bearable, but it's practically still a landmark in my regrets.

Not to mention the length of this story. I am sure I'm dragging this out. Almost 30 hours and we're not halfway through the released chapters of the game? This is a joke.

Nikke is... Complex, to say the least. Lots of elements, lots of tales, lots of inner workings and emotions which need words and time to be explained properly.

I should've just stuck to Oneshots. That would've been so much better. It would've portrayed everything so much better.

All in all... I'm tired. Not physically, not mentally, but emotionally. I don't know why I beat myself up so much for these past mistakes, when I should be learning from them, but I am all over the place.

I know that there are more than 500 of you actively reading the story. Do you even know how many people that is? I am so proud, I really am!

But this is just not about you...

This book is being abandoned.

It needs to be done, and I am so, so sorry. This is not the end of me as a fanfic writer, as I see a lot of room to improve, just the end of this era.

Caring Soul's been a great journey of developing myself and learning what works. Building a community and making friends along the way, what more could I have asked for?