→ A WEEK LATER
A week of silence from me, Heeseung continued blowing up my phone, not to mention there was probably a dent in my door from how often he knocked.
I decided to genuinely go missing in action, I was off work, I went out of the house only when I was for certain that Heeseung wasn't there, and so on.
Sure, it was pretty exhausting having to go out at either the ass crack of dawn, or some really odd specific time midday, but it worked, and I eventually got used to it.
My song that I had published a few days ago, became a viral hit, once again. I wondered, had Jake heard it? If so, did he manage to decipher the lyrics?
I wasn't that hopeful anymore, I just felt like half of me was missing. But I suppose that's life. That's all I told myself.
But finally, today, I decided to get myself out and do something I love.
It wasn't anything so special, I was just a special performer for a club that's pretty popular nearby.
Still, I was excited, and I looked at myself in the mirror before heading out. A sleek black dress, dripping to the floor, collarbones and shoulders exposed gingerly.
It didn't hide anything. Not the lines of my body, not the quiet tremble in my shoulders, not the way my chest rose and fell a little too fast.
I gave a deep breath, it's okay, everything will be fine.
I continued repeating those things until I got a notification from my taxi that it had arrived.
My stilettos clicked across my floor, the echo sounding loud and daunting across the halls of rooms. I grabbed the handle, and almost hesitated, but seriously, who do I think I am?
Since when did I lose the grip of myself? With that small talk to myself, I swung the door open, followed by a slam behind me, heading into the taxi which sliced through the night of the sky.
But despite this false sense of confidence I was telling myself to endeavour in, my body language gave my nervousness all away. The way my leg continued bouncing up and down in the back seat, the way my breath hitched and I was evidently sidetracked.
Why was I so nervous? I have no idea, but regardless, the feeling of impending doom crescendoed upon arriving closer to the club.
It was bustling from the outside already, I was due to perform for another half hour, yet the nerves racked up in my body as if I was diving into the deep ocean without a lifejacket.
I thanked the driver, one heel on the concrete, the other followed, and by the time I knew it, I was stood in front of this place, almost swept up in the blare of the lights.
I head inside, and the entire bar was decorated in a vintage sense that I was mesmerised and almost convinced myself that I had time travelled back a few decades.
Upon looking around the bustle and lights, I locked eyes with the owner of the place, who happily hopped over to me with the largest smile on his face.
"You're here! We're all excited to hear you perform, Ji-eun." The owner beckoned me to follow him, and follow him I did - I head over to the backstage of the front stage. It was relatively a small stage, but there was a large panoramic view of the entire club from here.
Someone was already performing, just singing a cover of a song, as some people danced mellowly and sung along, while others clinked drinks and laughed together.
Honestly, I think only a few people knew of my identity in the music industry, that included the owner of this place. He specifically sent an email towards my music persona, and requested kindly if I could show up.
To which, I was hesitant at first, but one day I'll have to uncover myself - right? So why not?
Maybe I was in a state of utter turmoil and at that point in my life where anything seems reasonable, because the next morning I almost peeled my face off out of annoyance over the fact I accepted.
I wasn't even drunk or anything, I literally just agreed to doing this.
But I felt too bad to cancel when I had already accepted, so here I am, tapping my heel incessantly as someone acts as static noise for me.
Who knew the key to speeding time up was spacing out? Certainly not me, because before I even snapped out of my daze, I was called up.
Actually - they may have had to call my name twice because clearly I was so entranced in the floor here that I didn't hear the first time.
With a slight reluctant tug at my feet, I stood up, swallowing all my hesitance behind me and walking through the curtain.
I'm here to create a performance, matter of fact, most people probably won't even look over at me.
YOU ARE READING
sim.jaeyun → macarons & motorcycles
Fanfiction- a motorcyclist, who has no regard for the law and lives his life recklessly finds himself obsessed with macarons from a bakery of which his best friend's sister works at
