Jurdan Oneshots

《23》

"We're engaged!" Jude exclaimed as the room burst into cheers, Vivi and Heather rushing forward to see her ring as Oak ran over to Cardan to give him a hug.

Just then, someone cleared their throat and silence fell across the room.

"First of all, congratulations," said Madoc, "I'm very happy for the two of you. And, Cardan, don't you ever hurt Jude, or I'll come to Elfhame and torture you myself. Second of all, I really wish you would have asked me first, Cardan."

"I'm sorry, Madoc, but you're just," started Cardan, "not my type."

Everyone in the room stilled like statues for a split second, and then they erupted into laughter, startling Cardan, which was soon stopped by the sound of something hitting a marble countertop hard.

"I meant that you should've asked me if you could have my daughter's hand in marriage, you teabag," said Madoc, pinching the bridge of his nose in between his thumb and his index.

"Actually, calling me a teabag is actually a compliment, because tea bags are good for making a convenient, mess free single serving of tea. But, when used, the tea bags themselves can also be reused for various purposes, including gardening, as compost and fertilizer, beauty treatments—to reduce puffiness and soothe skin, cleaning—degreasing dishes and polishing surfaces, and deodorizing things like carpets, refrigerators, and cars," responded Cardan.

"Why do you know that?" Asked Jude.

"Well, you aren't around often because you're always hanging out with Heather and Vivi, and Oak's on summer break, and he has a bunch of books on random stuff, and we tend to get bored."

"Cardan's quite fun to read with, actually. He makes jokes. And the ones he made about teabags actually made me spit out my water. Well, on his face. But we don't talk about that," said Oak.

"Yes, we do, and I'm still gonna get revenge, now get back here!" Cardan exclaimed as Oak started running.

Cardan then proceeded to bang his head against the corner of a shelf, stop for a second, almost lose his balance, stumble around for a moment, and then continue to run after his brother-in-law-to-be around the whole apartment.