Catching Feelings

14

Another day another city. I think to myself when I open my eyes. The curtain is closed in my bunk but I can hear Justin and Fredo talking to each other. I can't believe he's up already. I look down at my watch, 8am...this is insane he's never up this early. We are off today thankfully. I'm hoping to do some shopping alone if possible. I've been doing my best to keep things chill between Justin and I. Things just went entirely too far and to be honest it kinda freaked me out and in the haste of everything I broke things off with Jake. It was honestly the best thing to do. I really have no time for a relationship anyway. I think Justin also realized this wouldn't be a good idea because he hasn't said a word about what happened in over a week. It just crazy though because I've never been so drawn to anyone in my entire life.
I pull my hair up and drag myself out of bed. I find Fredo eating a bowl of cereal while Justin is on his phone either texting or Twitter. I nod at both of them but say nothing. I'm so tired yet I can never sleep the whole night. I plop down on the couch a few feet from Justin, he looks up and smiles "You look tired B..."
"I'm exhausted...I haven't been sleeping that great." instantly I want to kick myself in the ass...he's going to think he's the reason for my lack of sleep..I don't know maybe he is. He smirks "Huh..that sucks." is all he says.
I see Fredo watching us and I wonder if he knows anything...surely Justin wouldn't have told him about our little indiscretion. "So why are you two up so damn early?"
They both look at each other and shrug their shoulders. Fredo answers me "No reason really but we have the day off..."
"Thank god..I'm exhausted..." I say through a yawn.
Justin pats me on the leg "You just need to have some fun B..."

***

She gives me a little smile "Yeah, maybe..."
"Well you know what I want to do today?"
Her eyes flick to mine and then quickly away as if she knows what I'm thinking, but she doesn't "What?"
"I'd like to have a picnic...but when I mentioned it to dick over here," I jerk my thumb at Fredo "He looked at me like I was stupid." I never mentioned it to him, but thankfully he doesn't point that out to her. "Wanna come with me? It's perfect here."
She looks at me strangely "You want to have a picnic?"
I nod and wait for her response without saying a word as she thinks it over "Yeah, okay...a picnic sounds like fun. When do you want to go?"
I shrug "Like eleven?" as if I'm not ridiculously happy that she's agreed to go, which I am because she's been cool and stand offish for the last week or so. I honestly thought that if she broke things off with Jake we would just be together...stupid apparently. But I don't want to push her away...and so even though it's harder than hell, I haven't said a word and have been playing along with this just friends thing.
"Eleven sounds good." She stands and heads to the freezer "Alright, which one of you assholes ate my waffles?"
Fredo instantly points to me "He ate the last ones last night...I tried to tell him B."
I fix him with a glare of irritation, not because he sold me out about the waffles, but because he called her B...he knows it and winces, mouthing a silent "Sorry.." she doesn't notice.
I expect her to give me hell about the waffles, they're her favorite...I meant to have someone replace them but forgot..but she just smiles and throws the empty box away. "Who leaves the empty box in the freezer J?"
"I do...it's okay though, you threw it away." I wink and duck my head playfully as if I know I'm in trouble now.
She shakes her head and suppresses a laugh "You're a pain in the ass Bieber..."
"No I'm not..." I flash her a big, sweet grin and kiss the air in her direction.
She shakes her head again but can't help smiling back. "Ok, well I've got some emails to catch up on before we go, so I'll just go do that now, even though I'm starving because someone ate all the damn waffles."
I nod in serious agreement "Yeah Fredo...that was bullshit. Very selfish."
Rolling her eyes she heads back into her bunk. Fredo lowers his voice to a nearly silent whisper "A picnic? Like that's gonna work. You think you live inside a romantic comedy?"
I glance at him out of the corner of my eye. "We'll see..."
Later, when Bobbi emerges from the bathroom freshly showered and ready to go I can't help but burst into laughter. "I like your outfit...you look great!"
"Oh thanks I..." she begins before noticing that we are both dressed in jeans and plain white v necks, exactly the same aside from hers being fitted. "Shit...want me to go change?"
"Nah...fuck it." I say, grabbing the basket.
"What if people think we did it on purpose? I don't want to be that couple..." She stops herself short, cutting her own words off but it's too late, she almost said "That couple..."
I let it slide "Who cares, no ones gonna see us. Come on..." I hold the basket up proudly "Look, packed it myself."
"Did you?" She seems touched.
"Yep...I killed this picnic basket!" I brag while pretending to dusk my shoulders off "Now get your slow ass out the door."
~
"Oh my god Justin..." She sighs stretching out on the blanket we've laid out over the falls leaves "That was perfect, I ate way too much."
I pop the last raspberry into my mouth and lay down beside her "What's I tell you? Killed it."
She nods staring up at the trees above us "You really did...it's pretty though isn't it? Look at how bright the leaves are...I love fall. Beautiful."
"Beautiful..." I agree, but I'm looking over at her, and don't mean the scenery.
A single scarlet leaf falls and slowly flutters into her hair, and when I lean over to pluck it from her waves our eyes meet...I forget the leaf right away and watch her in silence with our faces so close I can feel her soft breaths exhaling against my cheek.
She's the first to break the easy quiet between us "Justin...the other night, I..." she trails off and then finally finishes with a soft "I'm sorry..."
"Don't be sorry B...I'm not sorry..." I whisper. "If I kissed you right now, would you stop me?"
Her eyes drift closed in response as I lean down to lightly sweep my lips against her own "Do you remember how easily you gave him up? For me? Doesn't that tell you something?"
She nods and places her hand on my cheek, drawing me in for another kiss as my hand moves slowly across her stomach. I pull away gently and trail kisses down her until I meet the v in her t shirt. She makes no move to stop me when I lift it over her head and pulls me closer when my mouth finds her left nipple, biting and sucking carefully through the silky satin it is hidden behind. When she is arching her back with tiny moans of frustrated need slipping steadily past her beautiful lips I pull it free completely and wrap my lips around it, sucking with the slow easy pace of someone who is enjoying every second, which I am.
My hand slides down to her jeans, easily popping the buttons open until I can slip it inside. A gasp of relief rides from her with a painfully sexy sigh when my finger dip inside of her and then back out to circle her clit, also with slow, easy curls of my fingers...babying it with the softest of pressure until her hips are rising rhythmically beneath me.
"I want to taste it B..." I breathe into her ear, not bothering to hide how badly I want it "Let me..."
She gives me permission with a slow "Yes..." while I move down her body, taking care to kiss even the most obscure parts of her along the way.
She kicks her ballet flats off to allow me to tug her jeans off, revealing nothing beneath them, it's just her waiting for me...just her, and for now, she's mine.
"Fuck B ...you could never know how much I want you..." I confess as the air rushes from my lungs at the sight of her.
She rakes her fingers through my hair and pulls me to her. I place a single barely there kiss just above her clit and then another directly over it before dragging the tip of my tongue over it. I bring it back to my mouth, moaning aloud with the delicious taste of her "Goddamn Bobbi girl..."
She whines with the sexiest hint of a pout, telling me she wants more and I don't make her wait. I couldn't even if I wanted to. My tongue begins to trace her slowly, moving in unhurried upward curls and gentle circles, stopping to bite with delicate pressure now and then until she is rocking against me, pushing herself closer while pulling me closer as well. I can no longer tell where I end and she begins and so I give in and cover her clit with steady flicks of the tip of my tongue while sliding two fingers in and out of her at a lazy pace, wanting to allow it to build inside of her slowly.
"Come on..." she begs
"Shhhh," I whisper calmly with my mouth still pressed flush against her "Just let it happen...I won't rush, so don't ask me to."
"But I want it...I want to...please..." Fuck, I could listen to her beg forever.
"And I'll give it to you...but just let it come baby..." I allow my lips to move against her with every word.
I feel the frantic eagerness fade slightly in her body and pull her impossibly soft clit into my mouth once more. Working it in and out much too gently until she is gasping and pleading again.
"Please..." she barely makes a sound "Now..please Justin..."
"Stop..." I order in a soothing tone "I'll make you cum B, just wait..."
I lean away to watch her as she moves continuously with frustration, causing the leaves beneath the blanket to crack and rustle, it's the only sound around us...
I stroke the pad of my thumb over her until she calms enough for me to continue. Her hands move through my hair a little faster as I work my tongue over her clit with increased speed in contrast with fingers, which are sliding in and out of her inch by inch.
Her thighs suddenly tighten around me, holding me so firmly in place as she begins to cum that she's the one moving her clit quickly against my tongue instead of the other way around. I manage to pull back and replace my tongue with my thumb because I want to watch her cum so badly.
She quiets completely for a moment as her lips part to allow her teeth to catch her bottom lip and she remains this way, totally silent, holding her breath, until a moan that borders on a scream rips through her.
I circle over her clit faster with my thumb "Come on Bobbi girl...keep going...fuck look at you..." I can't get over how perfect she looks, I can't believe how much I love to do this to her, to know I can make her cum this hard, to know that in this very moment, she wouldn't want to be anywhere else but here with me.
My mouth drops to take her clit between my teeth again...biting down harder than before when her moans become so loud they seem to be coming from my own head.
When she relaxes beneath me I make no move to stop until she is shaking and doing her best to push me away. I hate to see it end...I'm shocked by how desperately I wish I could live in this moment for the rest of my life. I make my way back up to her mouth and kiss her, she pulls me in frantically, deepening the kiss with a sigh of content before I feel her tense slightly.
"We should get going..." she says softly after a few seconds of silence.
She's doing it again, pushing something that we both want away because it's gotten too close. I don't understand it, but I nod and attempt to mask the sadness I feel every time she makes it clear that she's trying to convince herself that something so right is wrong. I move away from her and help her into a sitting position before I begin to pack up our picnic, in a rush to take her home, but only because that seems to be what she wants.