The Heart Wants What It Wants *Completed* (Old Version) Being renewed

Graduation Day

{63} People say time flies, and it's so true. To think that it was only yesterday that I started school with my brothers and met incredible friends that stayed true to me till this day. I can never be more grateful for having them in my life.

I feel like it's a goodbye. The way I think, the way I act. I feel like this is it, that this is my time. Everything that was happening around me was muted some kind of way, I can see people talking, laughing and clapping but I wasn't present.

Students congratulating each other as they walked to the front as their names were being called, taking their diploma's. Cameras flashes, flashing everywhere as they posed for a picture. If it wasn't for Sebastian's hand squeezing mine I would have stayed in the trance.

"Rebekah Arden?" A voice cleared it's throat and I snapped out of it with a huh from the daze and turned to look at Sebastian who looked at me with furrowed eyes from confusion and muttered 'are you okay?'.

I nodded my head at him and stood up with his help, walking toward the stage to take my diploma. I had to give a speech, I didn't know what to say. While having the blank paper in front of me I couldn't find the specific words to write down the paper. So I just spoke what was on my mind right now.

"Hello everyone, my name is Rebekah Arden and the first time I came to this school. I didn't thought that I would find people that would be supportive and really push me to be a better person but I found those person and they mean everything to me now."

"Most of you know that, it wasn't easy for me. I don't know if someone of you knows, but I was kidnapped when I was fifteen. It was such a horrific thing, I couldn't process it. I still can't sometimes."

"It was the people around me that helped me stay confident, that gave me the strength I needed. I wasn't happy at all, I mean who would? I had horrible thick and hideous scars all over my back, I felt like a freak, like a fail."

"I don't know how a person that goes through that can stay positive. Knowing myself, if I didn't have the people I had around me that time, I would have turned out bad. Some people don't know the pain you feel, sometimes."

"They think, oh it's just scars or oh, it's just this or that but they don't know the physical and emotional pain you endure while battling with yourself and telling yourself every time that no matter what, you should keep your chin up and that you're beautiful no matter what."

"I had people constantly remembering me that being flawless doesn't make you a beautiful person, but the scars and the pain you endure and still have the strength to fight and be a survivor. To be a warrior. I am a warrior and so are all of you that struggles with your pain in silence, that wished to be death and to be freed from the miserable life you're having." 

"People are ready to judge someone, and I say look at yourself first. Look at your mistakes and your faults, because you're no better to judge someone else. I go by this, only God can judge me because he made me and made me who I am now." 

"Nobody can tell me that I'm not beautiful, nobody can tell me that I'm ugly, that I'm fat, that I'm skinny. Who are you? Who are you to tell someone they are not worth it. If you think so is because you're the one that doesn't feel worthy and wants to make other ones feel bad about themselves."

"You need to love yourself first, learn to put yourself always in first place. Don't let anyone bring you down. The key of everything is love and family. These two are the essential key of happiness. Be surrounded with people that you know will always have your back, and be there for your through thick and thin, not only when you're at your best."

"Be with people who will be with you in your worst, in your darkest times. Surround yourself with friends that will give you their hand and pull you out of the darkness, out of the hurt, out of the pain. You are who you are surrounded with, be with people that makes you happy and makes you feel your worth, share and preach that love, nothing can go wrong with your life if you're always positive and have a smile on your face."