Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better

Daddy's Girl

I sit beside my dad. He's looks like hell, I don't think he'll make it. He's on life support and the doctors think he might be brain dead with lack of oxygen. I haven't been able to cry, I just feel numb.

Our father told us about two feelings in general. The first is that bottom of the ninth, bases are loaded, two outs, and the Yanks are down by three, you just know the next one was going out of the park. You only feel it one other time in your life, when you meet your soulmate.

The second feeling is numb. Our dad was in Korea and Nam, numb is the feeling you get when you watch your best friends die in combat. The feeling you get when you know in your heart you may need see your family again. Numb is the feeling you get when the doctor tells you that your baby girl might not make it. You can't cry, you're not angry, you're there but you're not.

I didn't understand what he meant by your baby nearly dying on you until I had an argument with my mom. She's been worried about me my whole life, I thought it was because of the car accident I was in. I was wrong. When CC and I were born, CC came out fine. I decided it would be fun to turn. The cord was wrapped around my neck and I was facing wrong way, I wasn't getting oxygen. I nearly died the day I was born.

I look at my dad and sigh.

I'm a daddy's girl. Rugby, hockey, cars, baseball, football, and fights, that's me for ya. Since George is a cock and doesn't really want much to do with our family and CC is well CC, my dad didn't really have a son. Yes, CC played hockey when we were younger and CC had the right parts but I was daddy's girl. I went with him to practices, I helped him in the garage, I watched sports with him. For the most of my life I did everything with my dad.

When CC and I were four, dad wanted to put CC into hockey and mom wanted to put me into ballet. I went to one class and hated it! When I got home, I went to the garage and sat on his work hence and glared at him.

"What's wrong, Bee?" He wondered with a smile.

"I hate ballet, I wanna play hockey like Bruce." I crossed my arms.

We went out that second and bought me skates and equipment. I went to CC's next hockey practice and fell in love. I guess you can say I like rough stuff. That's the first time I met James.

I played on the all boys hockey team through high school, winning state championships a couple of times. We were the Wolves and I loved every second of it. When I couldn't play in University, I just stopped playing.

Part of me wishes I didn't because it gives you a feeling when you step out onto the ice. It's early morning and cold even under the hundred pounds of equipment. The sounds the skates make on ice. The rush when you check someone into the boards. The crowd erupting once you score. I lived for it.

"I love you, daddy." I say as I get up.

I walk into the waiting room, the band, Jamie, and my family all sit there. I pull Robyn up on my lap and close my eyes.

I'm fucking beat.

Rikki

Bianca is on the verge of falling asleep with a crying Robyn on her lap. I kiss her forehead before getting up. I slip into her father's room. I stand at the foot of his bed and I look at him. Mr. Johannesson is hooked up to so many machines. I clear my throat.

"Mr. Johannesson, I don't know if you can hear me but I've got to say this." I take a breath. "My name is Rikki Rockett, I'm the drummer for your son's band and I'm dating your daughter. I understand that you probably want no more than to kick my ass right now but let me say this. I love Bianca more than anything on this planet, I assure you she's safe with me. One day, I am going to marry her. I just thought that you should know my intentions. I don't plan on hurting her, she kinda scares the crap out of me to be honest and so does CC." I laugh. "She's my whole world and I hope that when the time comes you give me your blessing to marry your daughter."

I go back out to Bianca and her eyes are open again, she's talking to Bret. I no more than sit down beside her and a nurse comes in.

"Mrs. Johannesson?" She calls and their mom stands.

The nurse tells her that her husband won't live once you take off the life support. Their mother cries and the nurse calls the priest.

We stand in the hospital room as the priest says the Lord's Prayer and then says the Catholic last rites. Life support is shut off and we watch as the heart monitor flatlined. Ana and their mother cry, CC and Bianca look a million miles away, starring into space. Bianca's grip gets tighter around my hand as the nurse covers her father's head with a sheet.

"Daddy." Is all Bee mutters.