forever young || k.t.h

暴力

days passed by, soon one week was gone just like this. today's the last paper, you can do it, heeyoung!

i went downstairs and took a glance at my father. he was giving me the 'first place or i will kick your ass out of this house' face. i pursed my lips while taking a deep breath in before heading out.

as i was about to plug in my earpiece, i heard three bimbos' conversation.

"is that girl in front the daughter of the CEO?" bimbo number one said.

is she referring to me? because, one, my dad is a CEO of some random companies here and in charge of electricity in america. second, yes i'm a girl, i'm his daughter. three, if they're not gonna shut up i will help them.

"i heard from the news that he hopes she will do him proud in school," bimbo number two said.

my hands were balled into a fist.

"and also—"

"and also if you don't shut up, then be careful. bitch." i said and walked off.

after i finished putting my useless things in my locker, i walked back to my class. i was reading my notes when those three bimbos came towards me again. ugh what do they actually want?

one of them pulled my hair, one of them had my notes in her hand and the other one, just talks.

the one holding my notes tore it into tiny pieces. I wanted to punch her in the face but the same girl was just in time to catch my hand.

"urgh!" i tried to break free from their grip. the three of them pulled me out of the classroom with my hair. students from other classes started fishing our their phones and took photos.

➳examination hall

i looked up at the clock. shit. i was only left with thirty minutes, but i just couldn't recall. i tried to but to no avail.

the only thing that i recalled was when they pulled me by my hair. i tried to shook it off and raise my hand.

"yes heeyoung?" the invigilator asked politely.

"may i go to the toilet?" i asked and she loomed around before she nodded.

i exited that cold hall and ran to the toilet. i occupied one of the cubicle and locked it.

am i here to shit? no. am i here to pee? no. and you might ask why.

my hand slowly reached down into my pocket and reached out for a pen-knife. i pushed it upwards. my hand was shaking. it slowly went deep down my flesh and up back to the skin. it was exposed to the surrounding but i couldn't feel a thing.

out of all those falls i've experienced, they were painful. out of all those cuts i've experienced, they were also painful. but this time, it felt like nothing. it was just numb.

my hands uncontrollably created an art on my wrist. so beautiful that it makes you wanna cry. i stared at my wrist while breathing heavily. it was as if i was on my death bed fighting for the last bit of oxygen. i managed to calm myself down before washing the blood down lukewarm water.

➳result day

"jung heeyoung!" mrs lee shouted for my name, finally! i walked up and took the result slip from her.

"good job!" she whispered into my ears. is that a bad news or a good news? i went back to my seat before taking a peek at my results.

third place?

"what the fuck?" i flipped and kicked my table before i ran out of the classroom.

my legs brought me up to the rooftop. i slid down onto my knees. my eyes began to water. "what can i do with a third place? i can't even go home and face him... i tried my fucking best." and that hit me. tears started streaming down my face. ever felt like you tried your best and you still couldn't achieve your goals? and then people come telling you "it's okay, this wasn't your 100 percent." little did they know.