Waiting

32

ADAM POV

I feel stuck. Like I've been in a white room sitting, waiting to escape. I kept pinching myself, hoping that I'll wake up from whatever maze this is.

The only voices I hear are my nurses who try to wake me up. Apparently I blacked out and been in a coma for a few days now.

But I felt this weird feeling when someone said my name. It was her.

"Damn you look horrible" she laughed. "I'm glad I didn't visit you sooner because I just needed some time away from you. But we've both established that we are not compatible in any way. But Fred's targeting me, Jeremy's been arrested, and he even tried to kill me when I confronted him. All my life I've strived to be independent, but right now I'm at crossroads. There's no way I can do this by myself. My health and safety's in danger and I don't wanna put all my problems on you, but you're my only option."

"I hear you Tori" I yelled at the white ceiling above. "Why can't you wake me up?"

I was hopeless. I knew she couldn't hear me, but I really wanted to make things right. I wanted to prove to her that I'm more then just some smash and dash guy. I got me a heart too.

She's cursed at me numerous times and gave me continuous chances even when I screwed up. I don't even know if I deserve to have her at this point.

Whenever I tried to make it up to her, I always forget how. I kept blocking myself from reality.

"What I'm trying to say," she continued, "is that I don't care what we are whether it be friends or whatever, but I NEED YOU TO WAKE UP. You don't understand how empty I am without nobody to share my happiness with, or someone to help build me up and keep my stable. I can't do it by myself."

I closed my eyes and sighed. She really needs me, and I can't be there for her. I can't do anything right now.

When I opened my eyes, I was somewhere else. I was staring at my body in a hospital bed. I really looked dead; who the hell would want to talk to me when I looked like that? I saw Tori sobbing right next to my bed, and my heart ached for her. If only I wasn't so stupid to hurt her like I did.

She put the penguin I got for her and the poem she wrote me on the counter. I smiled. She still kept the penguin even though I acted like a jackass.

"But you're right. I'm not ready to love you again. I feel like I'm losing you, and it's so much pain to take in. It's not something I can get used to. You know how relationships in hospital ends. I don't see us getting married in the future, so why put a burden on you. But right now I'm not giving up on you, because I'm never doing that." She was full on crying now.

Me jumping off the roof was just something out of pride, to show I was too good for her. And that's my biggest regret. That's what hurt her the most. It felt like every time I tried to please her I ended up pleasing myself and hurting her. I was too caught up in my feelings.

But I'm tired of looking at my choices in past tense. That fall must've really done something to me because I've finally had my wake up call. My happiness was coming from the wrong places. When she's happy, that's when I'll be happy.

I walked up to her and reached out to touch her. When I did, I felt this spark. I hugged her, feeling this weight lifted off my shoulders.

Then there was this rapid beep coming from the machine I was hooked up to. I could feel my vision getting blurry, and then everything turned black. My body began shaking uncontrollably, and I couldn't stop it. Foam was coming out of my mouth and I couldn't control it. I couldn't control anything. When my vision cleared, I was in an unfamiliar area. My ears were overwhelmed with the voices of nurses. My eyes shot wide open in confusion.

One of the nurses injected a needle in my arm, and my mind became blank. The shaking stopped, and I was now back to where I belonged. But it didn't feel like it. There were so many faces I didn't recognize. The one question that kept popping up was who am I?

Where am I?

Whose are these people?

I kept searching my mind for any clue as to what was going on, until I found something.

"Hello there" some lady in a pink outfit said. "Do you remember where you are right now?"

Remember. That's a funny word. I don't remember anything.

The people in the pink suits gave each other strange looks and then looked back at me.

"So you don't know who you are?"

I nodded.

"So we're going to run a few tests on you okay?"

"I don't know what that means but okay" I smiled.

Through the whole thing, Tori was the only word that kept popping up. The fact that I don't even know who I am but I remember her, that was mind blowing.

I was moved to another room where I was put into a brain scanner machine. Eventually I dozed off to sleep, and I woke up to murmurs. A doctor was talking to the people in pink suits.

"So right now, his case is a little confusing. Adam lost every trace of memory and has temporary epilepsy. His nervous system is shaky. But he can still express emotions. He can gain his whole memory back and no longer be diagnosed with Alzheimer's. The only thing is, there's no telling how long that will take. Or if it will happen. Please monitor him very closely and report any signs of him getting his memory back."

I guess that my name is Adam then. That's a nice name.

"Well I do know him and Tori have a close relationship" said one of the people in a pink suit.

"Okay we'll have her talk to him and see if she can be the key to this puzzle. Let's get to work then."

Thank goodness I can finally meet this Tori girl. Maybe she can remind me why she's so special.