Broken (Broken #1) SVU

Fifteen.

Sky's POV.

When I opened my eyes, I recognised the walls immediately. Machines beeped around me as I noted the wires snaking out of my arms.

I ripped the oxygen tube out of my nostrils and sat up. Immediately, nausea hit me and I gagged. What the hell had happened?

Amanda rested beside me, asleep on the edge of the bed. I couldn't see my Mom anywhere. I shook Amanda's arm.

"Amanda." I said.

She grunted and sat up, her neck cracking.

"Sky." She said, relief lacing her tone.

"What happened?"

"Oh sweetie, you tried to kill yourself."

I stared, shocked as the memories flooded back to me.

Oh no. The camera, the threats, the pills, running off to Amanda's.

"I... Urm." I stuttered, fear overcoming me.

"Sssh. It's okay. We're gonna help you."

"Where's Mommy?" I said.

In that moment, I felt like a little girl again, and all I wanted was my Mommy when I'd woken from a bad dream. Oh how I wish this was a bad dream.

"She's speaking to someone. We're gonna get you some help."

As if on cue, Mom walked in and she smiled when she saw me. She hurried over and drew me into a hug.

"I thought I'd lost you." She said.

I could hear the emotion in her voice and I felt awful I'd put her through this. Something had broken inside me, and the whole truth was destroying me.. But whatever happened, I couldn't let my mom get hurt. The threats pounded in my ears, reminding me of why I needed to keep quiet.

"I'm sorry." I said.

"The doctor said you can come home but first I'm taking you to see a psychiatrist."

"What?! No way." I said, panicking. "Please, it won't happen again I promise."

"You said that about the self harm but I've seen more cuts on your body. Sky, I'm only trying to help you."

I sighed and nodded my head, admitting defeat.

The doctor walked into the room, clipboard in hand. He removed the cannulas and checked my blood pressure.

"You're good to go but I don't want to see you here again, alright?" He said, his facial features as stern as anything.

"You won't."

I tried to add confidence into my voice but I don't think it worked. Who knows if I'll end up here again, I couldn't control myself and I knew it.

                  **************
Amanda drove us to the psychiatrist's office. I sat in the back seat playing with my hands, not wanting to have to talk to anyone about what happened. I couldn't risk the truth slipping out.
I wanted to let it out, I wanted more than anything to tell someone everything but I couldn't risk it. The danger was all too real.

"We're here." Amanda said, as we pulled into the parking lot.

I sighed. Amanda stayed in the drivers seat whilst I followed Mom into the building.

"Mom, do I have to do this?" I asked, dragging my feet.

"Yes. Now listen, the psychiatrist will want to talk to you alone but I'll be right outside the door, okay?"

I nodded.

"Sky-Leigh Benson?" A woman of around 35 said.

I took a deep breath and followed her into the room.

"Take a seat." She said, as she sat behind her desk. "I'm Doctor Foster."

I gazed around the office with awe. Books lined the bookshelves, happiness quotes spread over the walls. She'd doted plants throughout, and displayed pictures of her children on her desk.

"Look, I don't need to be here. I came to keep my Mom happy."

"Sky." She said, leaning back in her chair. "I've been your Mother's psychiatrist for 15 years and she wouldn't send you here if she didn't think you needed it."  

I stared in shock. My mom saw a psychiatrist. I had no idea.

"Oh." I said, deflated.

"I remember when you were a baby. Your mother wants the best for you. Why don't you tell me what's going on?"

I gulped and shuddered. The wall I had built, kept growing higher and higher and I couldn't utter a word.

"Sky. Let me help you."

"I.... things are hard right now. Stuff is going on and I'm finding it hard to cope. That's all. It's no big deal."

"It is a big deal. You've ended up in the hospital twice and you tried to end your life."

"No! No I didn't. I needed something to calm me down and I accidentally took too much."

"2 bottles too much."

My hands shook as I tried to come up with all the answers. I stood up and charged out of the room.

Olivia's POV.

After only 10 minutes, Sky charged out of the office and stomped to the exit.

"Sky?! Where are you going?" I shouted, standing up.

"I'm going back to the car." She shouted back.

She carried on out the door. I sighed and knocked on Doctor Foster's door.

"Come in." She said, sounding stressed.

"What the hell happened?" I said, hands on my hips.

"I'm sorry Olivia, I tried. She's not ready to talk yet."

"So that's it. You're just gonna leave her?!!"

I didn't want to shout at the doctor. She was my friend and had helped me through some bad times, but I couldn't help my frustration and fear.

"Olivia, please sit down."

I took a seat, putting my head into my hands.

"I'm scared."

"I know you are. I'm not going to leave her. I want you to bring her back to me in a week when she's calmed down. She's showing early signs of PTSD."

"What?!" I stuttered. "But she can't. Not my baby girl."

"I'm sorry Olivia."

I started sobbing and Doctor Foster sat next to me and put her arms around my shoulders.

"I'll help her. I promise. You need to stay strong for her. Keep an eye on her and let me know if anything changes."

"Thank you. I'm sorry I shouted at you. I'm just frustrated."

"I know."

"I've spent my entire adult life fighting for justice for others, and protecting the city from rapists. I never thought my baby would become one of those victims."

"It's hard to get your head around it but it's happened now. Just be there for her, let her know she's not alone."

I nodded my head and got up. I wiped my eyes and straightned my back.

"Thank you. I'll see you next week."