Road to Evergreen | #Wattys2016

f i f t y - t w o

It's been 5 hours. 18,123 heartbeats to be exact.

I'm rocking back and forth as I sit in a fetal position on the floor. I don't know what to do or think of anything anymore. He still didn't come back. And the questions that has been haunting me for hours keep coming back. Will he ever come back? Will he choose Lucian over me? What if he did? Doesn't this make me a terrible person? I shouldn't even let him choose.

I am a terrible person.

I glance at the clock and it's past midnight. Where is he? I grab my phone and text him to check up. An hour passes and I still didn't receive a reply. I weep.

What if something happened to him? Will he go after Lucian? No. This is Adam. My Adam won't do such thing. But after this, he's no longer my Adam. I don't know what to expect anymore.

After what feels like forever, I allow my burning eyes to shut. I dream about Adam and the way his love is what kept me going through all of this chaos. But then, every person interferes, leaving me shedding blood on Adam's tombstone.

He killed him. He killed his own brother.

I wake up sweating and my heart beat accelerating on a horsepower. The alarm clock beeps and I press snooze. I get up and search the house, calling out his name into the void. But he isn't there. He still didn't come back. I should leave. This is his house after all. I have no rights here.

I check my phone again but there's no reply. After debating with myself of what to do, I decide to go for my shift at Jackie's. It will occupy my mind with something else instead of dwelling on it.

The supermarket seems the same as I left it. I sit behind the counter and watch as the time passes: tic-toc, tic-toc, tic-toc. By the end of the day, the service seems to pick up and I'm exhausted when it's time for me to close up. I turn the lock twice and place the keys in my purse but when I turn, I freeze.

A gun is pointed at me and my blood runs cold.

"You should've told someone," his familiar voice echoes in my head. Riley.

"R-r-riley? What? I don't understand." I'm shivering as my eyes widen. I expected Lucian or Jeremy but Riley? Why?

"She killed her self. My sister killed herself," his voice comes out shaky. Sister? I cover my mouth with shock as tears well up.

"I-I'm so sorry. I didn't know."

"You didn't tell anyone!" He screams as he points the gun toward my face. I gulp down. I can see desperation swarming in his eyes and hesitation in the way he's holding the gun.

"Riley, put the gun down. Let's talk about this," I say. Where the hell am I getting this courage from? I'm supposed to be running for the hills.

"No!" He says. "Her name was Aida. She was only sixteen." He tries to fight the tears that are threatening to leave.

"You let her die! It's your fault!" He yells and I flinch. No. I shut my eyes close.

When will this nightmare end?

"I knew you were familiar from the minute you walked in the bar. Ofcourse you were! I mean, I found pictures of you in my sister's diary where she wrote everything!"

I can taste the fear, metallic at the back of my mouth. Shivers run through my back and goosebumps rise on my arms. "I couldn't say anything, Riley."

"Shut up!" His hand is shaky and I can see the confusion behind all of this. I don't blame him. I blame the world in general.

"Do you know what it feels like to read about it?" He asks as he grins his teeth. "Do you know what if feels like to read about your sister getting raped? Ofcourse you don't!" He pulls the gun to my head. "But I do!" He shouts.

The gun is pressed on my forehead and I can feel the irritating coldness it leaves. I alter my breath and speak up. I might die both ways but I have to do something.

"I know who she is, Riley." My voice comes out as a whisper. I clear my throat and continue. "I know who she is because after what happened, I couldn't sleep for years. I know she has a brother and two lovely parents. But I never knew it was you," I plead. His eyes paces between the gun loaded in his hand and my eyes, seeming unsure. I keep going.

"Lucian did it all," I stress on his name. "Lucian blackmailed me. Lucian made a bet for Adam to get to know me in order to shut me up. Lucian made Jeremy provoke a fight with Adam and I to distract me from the actual problem. Lucian raped Aida. Lucian let her die and paid for her funeral. Lucian is the monster," I raise my hand slowly placing it over Riley's. "I'm not the monster."

The darkness of his eyes reflect within mine and I can feel his inner pain from this close. His face falls as he drops the gun on the floor and I take him directly into a hug. I sigh in relief as I let him cry. "I'm so sorry," he keeps repeating. "I'm sorry, too," I keep repeating.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" he sobs. "Why?"

My heart aches and no words escape my mouth.

"Lesley, please!" he begs. "Tell me," he cries harder. I suck in a sharp breath, "I was scared. I'm still scared. I'm so sorry." I shake uncontrollably. He sobs and I sob. But he suddenly stops and loosen his grip on me.

"Lesley!" Riley's scream echoes in my ear as he tries to push me away. But it's too late.

The trigger has already been pulled.

****

Author's note

I would like to thank all the readers who have been reading my story. As well, I'm so proud of myself for being able to actually finish something I started. However, it's not finished completely because a sequel to Road to Evergreen will follow soon! Path to Deciduous. You think their story just ended? But on the contrary, it just started because so much is yet to come.