Stumbling through the dark

Busted!

Niall clicked 'send' and listened to the 'whoosh' sound effect as his emails went into cyberspace heading into various inboxes. He then turned off his laptop, putting it to one side before curling  up on his side. He closed his eyes but he was far from sleep. His mind was like a hamster wheel, thought after thought racing through his head, never stopping. He wished he had answers for everything but no matter how much he tried to make sense of things, the answers and solutions evaded him. Eventually the stress turned a headache into a pounding migraine. He endured it for a while before ringing for his nurse and asking for pain relief  . Slowly the medication worked its magic and Niall drifted into dreamless sleep to wake the next morning as pale sunlight filtered around the blinds covering his window. He blinked, eyes adjusting to the light , as a nurse bustled in with his breakfast tray. She arranged it on his bedside table as she told him about the various tests he'd be undergoing later. Niall groaned. It was going to be one long, miserable day.

The day of tests was finally coming to a close. Niall just had one more to do and this was the worst one, in his view. His face was brick red with embarrassment. He knew it was important to him, to his future, but it still didn't help. He listened to the male nurse giving him the instructions, his flaming red face buried in his hands. It was a relief when the nurse finally left the room and left him to get on with what was required of him. Wasn't he going to be left with any dignity, he wondered. Eventually he pressed the nurse call button and the male nurse reappeared and collected the sample Niall handed to him. The man smiled reassuringly at Niall. "I know it's not the greatest thing to have to get you to do but the results are important to your future." Niall nodded then looked away, eyes screwed tightly shut. "You'll get the results tomorrow" the nurse continued then hurried out of the room with the sperm sample. Niall could only hope that he'd be one of the lucky few and that the intense chemotherapy had not made him infertile. He'd had sperm frozen before chemo started but........uggh........he didn't want to go there. He shuddered. He needed a distraction. Niall grabbed his phone .

Louis and Niall chatted for nearly an hour. Louis was full of beans and soon had Niall laughing with his sassy comments. Louis asked how everything was going and Niall cheerfully brought him up to date, even telling him about the final 'insult' to his dignity. Louis was surprisingly sensitive in his comments which had the effect of making Niall feel less embarrassed about the whole issue. Eventually Louis had to go and after promising to Skype the next day, he ended the call. Niall fidgeted restlessly then decided he'd go for a wander around the hospital. He was so sick of seeing nothing but the four walls of his room , scanners and treatment rooms. Mind made up he quickly dressed more appropriately then headed out, slipping unseen  past the nurses station .Finally..freedom!

Niall , being Niall, soon ended up down in the hospital cafeteria. It didn't take him long to scan all the available choices and , in a very short space of time, was hidden away in a quiet corner, happily tucking into a roast dinner. He savoured every mouthful. It was so delicious after weeks of crappy hospital food. Catching sight of the time, he reluctantly swallowed the last few mouthfuls and headed back to his room. He was just about to slip quietly into his room when the quiet was broken by a very cross voice" Mr Horan! And where have you been?" Niall pulled a face as he muttered to himself...'busted!' and turned to face a very angry nurse.

"I...ah...just...when for a walk" Niall turned his bright blue eyes on the irate nurse as he smiled at her , trying his best to look innocent. She just glared even more at him and ushered him into his room. Niall felt himself wilting under her stern expression and rapidly obeyed her instructions to get himself back into bed. Once he had got himself back on the bed, he found himself having his temperature and blood pressure taken whilst she lectured him about leaving his room without permission.

"Your blood pressure is raised and you have a temperature" the nurse announced crossly. "Mr Taylor isn't going to be pleased. Now I'll bring your medication and then you can settle down for the night" She huffed irritably , and stalked out of the room, leaving Niall groaning in frustration. The nurse was back in minutes with a little paper cup filled with the various tablets Niall was required to take. She handed them to Niall and stood over him as he took them. Then she took some of the pillows away before lowering the head of the bed until Niall was almost horizontal. The blinds were then lowered over the window and the lights dimmed. Finally she left with a terse 'Good Night". Niall waited a few moments to check if she was gone before spitting out the tablets he had just pretended to swallow before creeping out of bed and flushing them down the toilet. He knew he was being childish but he was so sick of all the things that went with being sick. He had to get out of here or he'd go mad. He only hoped that Dr Peters and Paul Taylor  would agree to discharge him very soon.

Niall didn't have a good night. He tossed and turned restlessly though he did his best to pretend he was asleep whenever one of the nurses came to do one of their regular checks on him. He thought he'd got away with it but he hadn't managed to fool the nurses. Even if he had, his pale face and the dark circles under his eyes gave proof of his disturbed night. He picked miserably at his breakfast, eventually giving up all pretence of trying to eat, and pushing the barely touched meal from him. 

"Not so hungry?" Niall looked up miserably as Paul Taylor came into his room, the inevitable manilla folder of notes in one of his large hands. Niall gave him a small smile which quickly faded as he shrugged in response before muttering a barely audible 'No.'. Paul frowned to himself. Niall didn't look well, was obviously tired and very dispirited. He could understand. The poor boy had been through the mill lately but he wasn't doing much to help himself. Paul sat down on the end of Niall's bed in his usual, casual manner and studied his patient. "Want to talk?" he asked

"I'm just fed up" Niall responded quietly " I'm sick of this place. I want to go home and get on with my life"

"Understandable" Paul commented " I'd feel the same way. Let's just have a look at you and we'll see what we can do to get you out of here" He  rang for a nurse to assist him before giving Niall a very comprehensive examination. Once he'd finished, he raised the top of Niall's bed so his patient was once again sitting up. " Looking good, Niall" he said encouragingly. "Your test results from yesterday are also positive. You'll be given another blood transfusion today. You'll be given a prescription for medications that you will have to take for some time and instructions for you to follow until you have your follow up appointments. All in all, if you have a good night, I will arrange your discharge for tomorrow. Sound like a plan?" He looked at Niall who had the biggest smile across his face. Paul stood to leave and had just reached the door when Niall hesitantly called after him. He turned and smiled inwardly was he observed the blush that was crossing Niall's face.

"Ummm....the test...the... do you have the results?" Niall felt his blush deepen as his embarrassment grew.