Stumbling through the dark

We can control it but.........

Niall slowly came around to find himself on the floor, in the recovery position. The doctor was knelt down beside him while a fan directed cool air onto him. He sat up groggily. "M'sorry" he murmured "don't know what happened". Dr Beck smiled down at him and said the fact he had just forgotten to breath was a contributory factor. After checking he was feeling less dizzy, she helped him up and sat down in his chair once more before giving him a drink of cool water.

"Usually people faint after the possible diagnosis, not before. You got ahead of yourself, there, Niall" . the doctor quipped. "Seriously, are you up to talking now?" 

"Yeah, let's get this done. I don't think I'm going to like this" Niall spoke nervously.

"First Niall, this is not a confirmed diagnosis. I'll need you to see a Consultant who is the one who can best give the correct answers. This may be nothing serious but it also may be. That's why I'd like you to see a Neurologist who can do the necessary tests"

"But you think it is serious, don't you?"

"Yes, I do. The things I noticed during your examination and also from the answers you gave to my questions, I am 99% sure that you have developed a neurological condition. But, as I said, I am  a general practitioner, and no expert in this field. There are several possible causes, some minor, some more serious. It will be the Neurology department that will be able to provide us both with the answers.

"99%.. that sounds like you are very sure, to me" Niall murmured. "Just what do you think I have?"

I'm sorry, Niall, so sorry, but I think you have Multiple Sclerosis, often just referred to as 'MS'.

"What's that" Niall was puzzled, "I've heard of it but don't know what it is"

"Well, in simple terms, it is an autoimmune condition . That's when the body's defence system attacks the body instead. Your balance, vision and movement problems are the early symptoms of the disease."

"But you can cure it, just take medication and stuff, can't you?" Niall said fighting down his increasing panic.

"No Niall. We can help control it but there is no cure. There are a few types of MS. Some can go into remission and may  only steadily get worse before going into remission again. Another type will just continually progress. We need you to see that neurologist to  first determine it is MS and then, if it is, what type ."

"But what if it gets worse the whole time. What happens?" Niall's voice was barely above a whisper.

"Niall, first we need to get you seeing the neurologist. I know this is a lot to take in and, as I said, it's only a possibility you have it. I know it's a very strong possibility but let's take this step by step. Try not to worry about the worst case scenario until we have all the facts. I'll get onto this right away so you should be able to see someone  by the end of this week." She smiled sympathetically at the young man before her. He  was in an obvious state of shock. "Do you want me to ring someone for you? It might be best if you got someone to drive you home"

"No, no. I'm OK. I just want time to think this through on my own."

"Are you sure? I really think......." 

Niall cut her off with a shake of his head. He just wanted to be alone. After bidding her a quiet goodbye, he slowly walked to his car. Just how had a sore eye turned into this disaster. How had he got this illness and just what was going to happen? Niall climbed into his car and rested his forehead on the steering wheel. His phone suddenly bleeped, pulling him out of his daze. He looked at the caller...Harry...then rejected the call. The phone bleeped again, and Niall turned his phone off. He wasn't ready to talk to anyone. He just wanted to be alone and as far away from here as possible.He turned the key in the ignition and, as the engine roared to life, drove out of the Medical centre parking lot, travelling aimlessly, not caring where he was heading.

"