Love hurts?

When I'm gone

Robert's POV

"you know, this morning I literally sat there and watched them sticking a needle in their arms and did nothing" I croak to Mollie who's been my best friend since I could remember. "did they do it wrong? Their ok aren't they?" She asks concerned. "they injected themselves with heroin! There's nothing ok about that! and the worst part is that it's my fault their like that"

"you don't know that for sure" she tries to reassure me. "but I do! Ocean and Michael came to me that night with a baby needing help and instead I... I gave them that shit" I frown angry with myself. "Robert, from what you've told me. They were both troubled young kids long before they came to you"

"no..Ocean was a sweet, shy and polite little girl and she'd never so much as skip school and Michael...well I haven't known him that long, but you can tell he was sweet kid too once and the way he is with Ocean and Nevaeh is amazing. I only wished my parents would have given me even a quarter of the love and attention they have for that little girl" I sigh. "I'm sure they are good parents and at some point they were good kids, but Robert you have to remember. Alot has changed since you've been out of Ocean's life. She's not some innocent little girl anymore. She's 18 years old. Got married illegally at 16 had two kids, one at 15 that was taken away, because they were doing cocaine instead of looking after him! And the one they do have they have living in a drug house with them and their doing drugs around! Are you gonna blame yourself for that too?"

"of course not, but..."

"but nothing. Yes you gave them that stuff, but like I said. Those two were troubled along time before this happened and if they hadn't got it off you then they only would have gotten it somewhere else eventually and if it's upsetting you this much then why don't you stop it?" She shrugs. "because I'm weak! You know that! I can't even face telling Ocean about... If I can't face telling her that how the hell I'm I supposed to help them with this?" I croak. "you still haven't told her?" She frowns. "it's not exactly and easy subject to bring up" I shrug sarcastically. "but, you told her you had aids, surely she knows"

"she doesn't" I shake my head. "well you have to tell her! Just find the right moment and..." 

"how!?" I cut her off "when exactly is the right time to tell her? Over dinner? While she's shooting up? When she gets through the door?.... Oh, by the way I'm dying!"

"obviously you don't just blurt it out like that" she rolls her eyes. "does Michael and Ray know?"

"Ray knows and Michael has and idea but..."

"can't he tell her? Maybe it'll be better coming from him. Their married and he'll know the best way to bring it up and how to say it and..."

"he wont, i've asked him already" I cut her off "will you look out for them... When I'm.. you know?... Gone?"

"of course! You don't have to ask me something like that. I'll look out for the both of them I promise" she nods and smiles through pursed lips."their young kids and there's gonna be alot of people just waiting to take advantage of them and manipulate them and if their alone who knows what will happen and..."

"trust me. I'll take care of them and I'll even help get them back on track. I'll find one of them programs for them if need be" she smiles reassuringly. "thank you" I croak pulling her in for a hug then break away. "is there something else?" She asks and I nod. "well what is it? Whatever you need I'll..."

"I can't do it" I sob and she looks at me confused. "I can't let Ocean sit back and watch me slowly die"

*********

Michael's POV

"Go to mommy. You can do it!" I encourage Nevaeh while holding her steady trying to teach her to walk "Mmm ma ma"

"did she just?" Ocean smiles suprised and I nod "her first word!" I smile excitedly as Ocean wraps her arms around her. "I can't believe how fast their growing" I sigh contently. "I know! I wonder what their gonna be like when then grow up?" Ocean smiles. "well DJ loves building houses. He'll probably do something cool like have his own construction company or something... and this little one!" I coo picking up Nevaeh "loves music and your gonna be a total diva, aren't you princess?" I chuckle. Ocean's about to speak when Robert comes home. "hey guess what!? Neavah just said Mamma!" Ocean tells him and he nods smiling through purses lips. "That's great!"

"are you ok?" I ask concerned seeing his bloodshot eyes. "yeah, yeah I'm fine. Just a little tired. I'm gonna go lie down for awhile" he sniffles, heading to his and Rays room and I nod.

"did he look like he'd been crying to you?" Ocean turns to me. "nah, just tired" I shrug. "he gets tired alot lately" she mumbles and I can see the worry in her eyes. "he probably just shot up, we get like sometimes" I point out and she nods and continues playing with Neveah. Ocean knows about Robert having aids, but she doesn't know how bad it is now. Robert asked me to speak with her about it, but I've told him I don't think it'll be right coming from me. I know if it was me and something was wrong with one of my siblings I'd want them to be the one to tell me not let me find out from other people.

******

Frank's POV

After I get the call I head over the Mollie's place. "so what did you find out?" I ask sitting on the sofa. "well by the sounds of it the two of them have been messed for years and Robert doesn't have that much time left either"

"perfect!" I smile "their messed up bit their not broken. Not yet" she points out. "maybe not yet, but once Roberts out of the way, they'll have nobody so it'll be slot easier to break them down"

"they still have families though and two kids. It's not gonna be that easy"

"your not backing out on me are you?" I frown and she shakes her head. "of course not! I'm just saying it's not gonna be easy. Not like the others. Like I said they still have families..."

"and you think their sweet wholesome families are gonna let some junkie little street rats back in their lives?" I chuckle slightly. "listen sis, do you have any idea how much two young, good looking kids could make us? Those kids are goldmines! Do not mess this up!"

"and I won't and I know how valuable those two can be for us. that's why I picked them out in the first place and Robert trusts me to take care of them, which means it won't be that hard to gain their trust when he's gone"