Recollections

The Time To Shut Up

The Time To Shut Up
(song of the chapter: Don't Find Another Love // Tegan and Sara)

Austin's POV
Mom is smiling across the table at Erin. Erin has a generic smile plastered on her face and I can see that something has pissed her off. I'm trying to think back to what I've said over the past few minutes but I can seem to find what could've triggered her frustration.

She's being polite and my mom hasn't seemed to notice that something's bothering her but I know her all too well.

"Won't you two ever get married?" Mom starts her prying and I can feel my face heat up.

"No Mom, please!" I blurt before Erin feels pressured to respond.

Chair legs scrape against the floor with a toe curling sound and I look over in time to see Erin standing up from the table. She's staring--no, glaring--right at me and there's a fire in her eyes. And not the good kind.

Erin runs her tongue over her teeth, something she only does when she's aggravated. "Excuse me for a moment." She says to my Mother, even though she hasn't stopped shooting lasers at me with her eyes.

Erin leaves the dining room and I let out a heavy breath. My hands immediately run down my face and I hear my mother laugh breathily. I glance up at her and see her shaking her head.

"Oh Austin," she teasingly scolds. "You've really done it this time." So she had noticed Erin's annoyance towards me during dinner.

"What?" I play dumb.

"You sure know how to work that girl's nerves." She says, nodding towards the kitchen where Erin is now washing dishes. Mom grabs her purse and stands up from the table. "I'm gonna go, you have some groveling to do."

I walk her to the front door and let her out. She gives me a brief hug before stepping outside. I deliberately walk slow as I head to the kitchen.

Erin's back is to me but as soon as I enter the kitchen the faucet cuts off. She dries her hands on the dish towel placed beside her then turns to me.

"Am I in trouble?" I ask with a sheepish grin.

Erin scoffs and turns back to the sink but doesn't return to washing dishes. "Do you think this is funny, Austin?"

I start to respond. "Well--" Erin turns to me, holds up one of her hands and I stop my sentence before it even begins.

"Because I just spent the last half hour of dinner wondering if I just wasted the last year and a half with you." Erin snaps.

"What?" She's genuinely confusing me.

"You told your mother you don't see yourself marrying me, so why are we even dating? Why do we live together?"

"Erin," I groan. "I didn't say I don't see myself marrying you..."

"You said no when she asked if we'd ever get married, did you not? Because I thought we'd both agreed we weren't ready to get married yet, but damn I'd thought you'd want to marry me eventually! I mean, I want to marry you eventually, but jeez you don't want to marry me ever."

I'm shaking my head no. "That's not what I meant, Erin, and you know it."

"So tell me, when we both agreed we weren't ready for kids did you mean you never want to have kids with me?" Her voice just rose an octave.