Dear You #Wattys2016

Fourteenth Letter

14th Letter

Dear You,

For the past few letters Raf I may have told you all the beautiful memories that we had. All those love bubbles we stayed till we could remember

But we had our darkest days, we had our fights, we had our differences and we had days we wish that we can forget about it

But we can't Raf because it's part of us, it's part of our story

And most of all, it's part of why we broke up

Remember when your secret revealed?

Remember how I found out about it?

That day was the 19th of July, the day after our first monthsary. It wasn't supposed to go that way Raf but we had a fight, a big one

I still remember that day, it was in the afternoon when suddenly my Tinder app just popped saying you were online

Yes, I still did have my tinder account and you still had it too, you told me before that you deleted that app already because it was useless since you already have a girlfriend and I, on the other hand, you knew I still hadn't deleted it but I haven't used it ever since but that time suddenly it just popped out of nowhere

I suddenly became so nervous, I suddenly had thoughts, dirty thoughts in my head, di yong bastos na "dirty" pero thoughts na ayaw kong isipin

Bakit mo itinago sa akin ang fact na may tinder ka pa?

Bakit di mo sinasabe sa akin ang totoo?

Gusto kitang tanungin agad nun Raf, the moment I knew you were lying but I was scared, damnn takot na takot ako nun, di ko alam kung anong gagawin ko pag nagsinungaling ka ulet

Anong sasabihin ko? Anong gagawin ko?

Then in the afternoon, I decided to ask you

Me:

Babe, may gusto ka bang sabihin sa akin? :)

Boyfie :

Ha? Wala naman babe, bakit?

Yes I decided to name you "Boyfie" in my phone since you are already my boyfriend

Me:

Wala, baka may gusto ka lang sabihin eh

Boyfie:

Wala naman babe :)

Me:

Ahh... Diba babe sabi mo dinelete mo na yung tinder account mo?

Boyfie:

Yes babe, bakit babe?

Me:

Ah.. Kase biglang nag pop out yung pangalan mo sa tinder ko saying you are online, so paano nangyari yon? Nag online lang siya sa sarili niya?

Yes I was pissed, I was starting to get pissed at you, sinasabe ko na nga ba Raf, I knew you would lie

Then you told me your reasons, your freaking reasons that I wasn't supposed to believe at, yes, di naman kita agad pinaniwalaan

You told me you tried to sign in your tinder account just to see how it's going and yung araw lang naman yon. Grabe noh, so you just downloaded it immediately to see how your account is going?

Fuck that bullshit reason Rafael!

Me:

May gusto ka pa banng sabihin?