Aries: It's not that the man didn't know how to juggle, it's just that he didn't have the balls to do it.
Taurus: My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
Gemini: There was once this cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.
Cancer: Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor said I'M OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
Leo: When the window fell into the incinerator, it was a pane in the ash to retrieve.
Virgo: Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
Libra: I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.
Scorpio: Need an ark to save two of every animal? I'm the Noah guy.
Sagittarius: The man who survived the mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
Capricorn: I'd tell you a chemistry joke, but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.
Aquarius: Show me a piano falling down a mindshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.
Pisces: I'm reading a book about anti-gravity, it's impossible to put down.
