Keep Me Where The Light Is (Camren)

Ch 23

Warning: Angst 😅
(^^ yup, this chapter deserves a warning)

[To Listen To: 'Never Be Like You (feat. Kai)', by Flume]

//

But then I hear the door open, and the words spill out of my mouth, "Luce, can we go--"

"Lo...?"

"...home," I whisper, because I've run out of breath from holding it all in--

And my body, it suddenly remembers it needs to breathe.

Camila locks the door behind her, and the world outside of this room stops existing.

She's staring intently at me; her eyes are dilated, but the expression on her face is almost unreadable.

The tension in this tiny space is heavy, but my voice comes out light as a whisper, "Camila, what're you...?"

She moves towards me, and traps me against the counter, with both arms on either side of me.

Camila's just barely touching me, but I can feel the weight of her presence; I remember the heat of her body.

I can smell the liquor and the weed off her breath, as her eyes lock down to my lips.

"Don't--" I manage to whisper, pulling back.

Her eyes don't leave my mouth, and she answers softly, "Why not?"

The question rings in the air, and for a moment, it's deafening.

"Because it's wrong," I finally answer. "Lucy's my--"

I see the flash of anger in her eyes, and she cuts in, "I don't give a fuck about Lucy."

Then she shuts her eyes briefly and continues, softening her tone, "I want you back-- I want us back. I thought I made the right choice-- I really thought... But I'm-- I'm ready to make it work, to put all of that shit behind us, I...I miss you, Lo..."

I'm stunned; because every syllable feels like a promise trying to dig itself out of a grave that I've already mourned.

But Camila follows the path of her words, and she leans her body in, melting against mine.

Her eyes slip down to my lips again, and I feel my vision closing in on hers.

How easy would it be...?

But then my heart blinks, and I realize what's about to happen; so I turn my face to the side, causing her to stop abruptly.

The tension bursts, and I don't need to look at her, to know the rejection hurts.

But Camila remains still; she remains quiet, like she's in shock.

I try to put some strength behind my voice, but it comes out soft, "Camila, you're drunk, and you're high, and--"

I shut my eyes, and I continue without thinking, "And...you're the who gave up on us--"

It isn't until I let those words loose, that I realize how much I've been holding on to them, this entire time.

Saying it feels like closure; saying it feels like freedom.

It's the last thing I held against her-- the last thing I need to let go.

My voice steadies, and I open my eyes and say, "I'm...happy, Camila-- with Lucy, I'm--"

I flinch when she slams her fist on the counter.