Falling Apart

His Shirt

I couldn't stop the pain from spreading around my body like a virus and making me sob on Evan's shirt.

He was hugging me so tightly it almost hurt. I wasn't returning his hug. I was too in pain to do anything. At first I let him but I didn't want him to touch me anymore.

Who am I kidding? I wanted him to touch me, to hold me close like he used to but I couldn't let him. For some reason I couldn't so I moved away from his embrance.

By then I stopped sobbing. It was torturing silence then.

I stared up at him. He looked away. Hurt. He was trying to hide it but he failed badly.

I inhaled loudly. I realized that I basically told him what happened without saying it. I frowned and looked away. I didn't know what to do. I decided to speak.

"I'm sorry..I'm gonna..um-"

"Crystal, you don't have to keep apologizing.." He bit his lips. A nervous habit of his. But damn he looked sexy.

I didn't realize I was staring at his lips until I noticed that he was talking to me.

"...did he..?" He started.

I backed away in defense.

"No, he- n-no. He..um- n-no. N-no." I started to stutter. I hugged myself and backed away further and he started to walk towards me with an angry concerned face because he knew I was lying.

"You don't have to keep lying.."

"Evan, I'm not lyin-"

"You know you can tell me anything."

He got closer.

"Please," I almost laughed at what he said.

"What?" He asked.

I hit a wall. I couldn't back away any longer.

He was now standing in front of me. I couldn't help but stare at his lips. They were so full and beautiful. So different from my life. Get what I did there? Ha. Ha.

Not funny.

"Nothing Evan." He stared at me. His face concerned.

I didn't like acting this way towards him but I had to. I didn't know what to do. This day has been the worst. I just wanted to sleep and maybe would take me in my sleep if I was lucky enough.

I have a bad habit of always being rude or mean toward anything when I'm confused.

He tried touching me but I moved away before he could. I didn't mean to. I honestly didn't. It just happened. I can't take it back now.

That hurt expression painted his beautiful face again. And for the first time, I disliked a piece of art.

I didn't want to cause him anymore pain but I knew if I tried to leave he wouldn't let me.

"I'm tired.." I whispered.

He stared at me, and he thought I didn't but I noticed he was staring at my lips.

The atmosphere was tense. I could almost feel it.

I didn't want anything to happen that'd regret later.

"I'll leave tomorrow morning."

"You don't have to... You can stay as lo--"

I interrupted him, "No. I don't want to bother you."

He stayed silent. He knew better than to argue with me. I walked around him to go to his room.

He stopped me by grapping my wrist. We both stared at it and then he quickly let go. Then I noticed that he wanted me to get the shirt that I was wearing before I threw it at him and attempted to leave.