The Possessive Defender || Paddy McNair

Chapter forty-two

We finally reached my house and to say that Paddy was there and looking mad would be an understatement.

"I can't believe it," my mums says in utter shock and disbelief once we've filled in our parents.

Carmela's parents and James' parents are both here as well as Larry's parents. Larry's mum was in tears and her husband was doing his best to comfort his distressed and upset wife.
The pain that Frank put them through. The pain he put us all through. He took away the life of someone's child. An only child.

Dean nudges me slightly on the shoulder with his as he stands next to me. "Em-"

I'm quick to interrupt him. "Don't Dean, I feel terrible as it is," I whisper the last part, tears clouding my vision.

"Emma I'm sorry," his voice holds sincerity.

But I can't. For some reason I can't shake the look he gave me earlier before storming out of the café. I quickly turn around and leave the front room where everyone is sat in distraught and rush to my bedroom, locking the door behind me before the tears threaten to spill.

Frank touched me. He touched me knowing that he'd killed my brother's best-friend. He'd kissed me knowing that he'd severely injured my brother and he hugged me knowing that he'd put my brother's other best-friend in the hospital along side him. I feel disgusted.
He knew. He knew and he didn't say anything, he pretended as if everything was alright, that it wasn't such a big deal. He'd get sick of me crying over the accident and he'd get angry at me sometimes too but I never understood why it caused him to react like that. It's pathetic.

There's a knock at my door. I instantly wipe away the tears under my eyes leaving small smudged wet patches. I don't want anyone to see me crying and not because they think I'll be crying over Frank which I'm not really, I'm crying because I am so upset. I mean I trusted him and he lied to me. I'd be happier if he actually did break up with me over the football.

The knock sounds again. I snap out of my thoughts and unlock my door pulling it slightly back to reveal Paddy.

He looks angry but his facial features soften when he sees that I'm upset. "Hey have you been crying?" he asks softly as he steps into my room and closes the door.

I nod my head slightly before walking up to him and wrapping my arms around his torso; burying my face in his chest. He doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms securely around me and the security of his grip makes me realise that I shouldn't be crying over this. I've got Paddy and he'd never do something like that. Paddy is always looking out for me, always protecting me, he isn't afraid to defend me and he certainly pays attention to me. He's loving and caring and just all round humble in my eyes. He's the love of my life.

"Are you crying over him?" he asks bitterly.

I shake my head into his chest. "I'm just disgusted." with that being said, Paddy takes a hold of both of my upper arms and pulls me away from him gently so that he's looking into my eyes which have now become wet again.

"Why?" he asks.

I sniffle. "Because he lied to me. He touched me and kissed me after the accident but he didn't even try to console me over my brother or James. He'd always change the topic, he'd always get angry at me for even mentioning Larry and he wasn't there to comfort or support me but he had the nerve to kiss me," I'm still crying but I've become angry all of a sudden.

"I could punch him for even putting his lips on you knowing what he'd done to your family and Larry's," Paddy says with a clenched jaw.

"I would rather he have broken up with me over the football," I admit.

Paddy sighs. "This is why I didn't want you to see him."

"Why not?" I ask a bit taken aback by his statement.

"Because he's messed with your head!"

"Paddy I had to see him! I had to find out why!"

"That guy in the café explained it to you!"

"Yes but that was Leon's version! I had to hear it from him. I had to know why he did what he did," I cry. I know Paddy's angry because I went against him but I'm not going to stand here and let him blame me. "I had to hear it from him," I repeat.

"Well are you satisfied now that you've heard it from him?" he says in a bitter tone.

"Paddy why are you being like this?" I ask as I move out of his gentle grip on my arms.

"Being like what Emma? Being your loving boyfriend? Trying to protect you from certain people?"

"Protect me from who?" I yell before waving my hand in the air. "You know what Paddy, I don't want to argue with you. Now is not the time and if you're not willing to support me in a time like this then leave. Leave because I have already had one boyfriend neglect me in a time I needed him the most and I do not need another one."

"Yeah but I'm not the one that killed him."

"No you aren't but Paddy, you're killing this relationship. You get jealous over practically anything to do with a guy that looks my way. You get jealous when a boy texts me and not random boys, friends from school but of course they're random to you. If you don't want me being friends with them Paddy then all you have to do is ask instead of starting an argument!" I say in frustration. I'm so angry right now. I just want Paddy to hold me but I know that we both need to sort our heads out first.

He stands there speechless.

"Now if you don't mind, leave please-"

He cuts in. "If I'm killing the relationship then maybe you should just go back to Frank," he says loudly before storming out of my room and a few seconds later I hear the front door slam and that's when I breakdown in tears on my bedroom floor.

Did Paddy and I just break up?