Anger, Love, and Loss

Saturday, October 31st, 9:30 AM

I wake up on the floor of my bedroom in a sleeping bag. Nikki is on the floor next to me and Lindsay is in my bed. I throw my pillow at Nikki's head. "Well good morning to you too," she says, sitting up. Jessie walks into the room.

"Mom made pancakes," she says. "They're getting cold."

"Thanks. Are you sure you don't want to come tonight?" I say. She leaves the room without answering. Lindsay's phone vibrates on my nightstand.

"Ooh," Nikki says. "Who's texting? Is it your..."

"Boyfriend?" Nikki and I say in unison. Lindsay checks her phone, having of woken up before Jessie left.

"Yeah," she says unlocking her phone.

"What'd he say?" Nikki asks.

"Good morning, can't wait to see you later, blah, blah, blah."

"Let me see," I say getting up and looking over her shoulder. "Good morning Sunshine, sun emoji, sunflower emoji. Can't wait to see you this evening, sunset emoji. Love you beautiful. Kiss emoji."

"Awwwww!" Nikki and I say.

"When do we get to meet him?" Nikki asks.

"Tonight. I'm meeting him at his house before we start trick-or-treating."

"Ooh! You know who I want to meet?" Nikki asks.

"Who?" Lindsay says.

"Pancakes."

Nikki gets up and runs down the stairs. We chase after her. My parents, Jessie, and Nikki are sitting at the table when we get down, along with Josh and the boys.

"Josh! Hey," I say giving him a hug. "Happy Halloween! How are you holding up?"

"Sarah! I'm good, thanks. I think I'm finally starting to process what happened. I was in sort of a daze before, if you couldn't tell."

"That's good. Hey Michael, Lucas. How are you guys doing? Are you ready to go trick-or-treating?"

"Yeah," Michael says. "I'm going to be Batman!"

"And I'm going to be the Hulk!" Lucas chimes in.

"Batman? And the Hulk? That's awesome!"

"Sarah, what are you going to be?" Michael asks.

"I'm going to be a princess."

"Are you going trick-or-treating with us?" Lucas asks.

"No, sorry. I'm going with Nikki and Lindsay. Maybe we can meet up later, though."

"Okay, girls? Who wants pancakes?" Mom says. I sit down in between Nikki and Michael.

"So, Jess," Nikki says. "Have you finished that essay for Ms. Ryedhart's class?"

"No," Jessie says, cutting up a link of sausage.

"Well, do you know what your topic's going to be yet?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, cool. Mine is the history of Halloween. What's yours?"

"How kids can get addicted to sugar," she says taking a bite of her sausage.

"Ooh, that's cool! What do you have so far?"

"I have to go to the bathroom," Jessie says putting down her fork and walking away from the table.

"Well okay. So, Lindsay, what time are we leaving for Ryan's house?"

"Um, well trick-or-treating starts at six, so I want to be there by around five-thirty. So about five-fifteen-ish," Lindsay says, sitting across the table.

"Ooh, Lindsay, who's this Ryan you speak of?" Mom asks, bringing another batch of pancakes from the stove.

"He's my boyfriend. No big deal."

"Does Lauren know about him?"

"Lauren? Oh, you mean my mom? Yeah, I guess. I mean, this is the second time we've dated. My parents met him the last time, but they don't know we got back together. I mean, they know I'm dating someone it's just that they don't know who that someone is. Please don't tell them. They don't really like him. I mean, at all."

"Don't worry. I would never. But you do know they have to find out at some point, right?"

"Yeah, but there's a time and place for everything, and I would like to tell them myself, then and there."

"That's completely understandable."

"Thanks."

"Okay, who wants to help decorate?"

"I call raking!" I yell, running out the back door and into the shed grabbing the rakes. I walk back to the house. "Linds, Nick, help!" I hand them each a rake keeping one for myself. Jessie walks back into the kitchen.

"Jess," Mom says. "Help your sister with the yard. Go grab another rake from the shed." Jessie gives me the death stare on the way out. "Okay, let's get started." Lindsay, Nikki, and I walk outside and start raking the leaves into a pile.

"Hey," I say after a while. "Let's make a leaf pile so we can jump in it."

"That's a stupid idea," Jessie says.

"Jess! Even Cinderella needs to have a little fun," says Lindsay.

"Hey Cindy," I say to Nikki. "Hand me a garbage bag."

"Um, my name's Ella. Don't be rude," she says handing me a bag.

"Hey, Rapunzel!" Lindsay says, throwing a handful of leaves at me. I throw one back.

"Take that Ariel!"

"Hey!"

"Where'd Jess go?" Nikki says.

"I don't know," I say. Mom comes out into the yard.

"Sarah? Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Um, sure." I put down my rake and run over to her.

"What in the world did you do to your sister?"

"What do you mean?"

"She ran up the stairs crying."

"What? I don't know? I'll go check on her.

I go inside and walk up the stairs. "Jess?" I say walking into her room. "Jess, what's wrong?" Jessie is curled up in a ball on her bed. "Jess?" She sits up, her face red and tears streaming down. I run over and sit down next to her. "Jess, what's wrong? What happened?" I say giving her a hug.

"John." More tears fall. "He, he, when I was outside I got a text. It was him. He broke up with me. For her." I squeeze her harder. She doesn't need to tell me who it is. I know.

"Don't worry. Abi will get what's coming to her. And as for John, we bought and extra princess costume in case you changed your mind. It's green." She hugs me back.

"Okay, thanks." I stand up. "And Sarah?"

"What?"

"You were right. Thanks for trying to stop me."

"You're welcome. I'll be downstairs when you're ready.

I walk back downstairs and out into the yard.

"What happened?" Nikki asks. "Is Jess okay?" I pick up my rake. The yard is almost done.

"Yeah, she's fine. John tore her heart out again. We made up. I invited her to come with us tonight."

"Good thing we bought that extra costume. Is she coming to Ryan's too?" Lindsay asks.

"Most likely. Okay, let's bring these bags in."