Don't leave - a Tivi Story [ON HOLD]

>24<

Walking through the park should bring peace and ease to the mind. The opportunity to relax and let go of everyday thoughts and doubts, problems surrounding us constantly. The sun hid behind the clouds, wind blew and lifted up some fallen leaves off the ground, swirling in the air before landing somewhere further away from their prior spot. A quiet day, no traffic or passers by on the outside, all sitting at home to take care of their work, children and home. Everyone belonged somewhere and stuck to it.

"What's on your mind?"

The leaves under their feet crunched as the couple walked through the park, neither holding hands nor walking too close to one another for safety reasons. Avi's gaze was fixed to the ground, his head hung low as he played with the hem of his shirt.

"Nothing in particular."

He couldn't possibly tell Tim how afraid he was to meet someone face to face who knew about him, who he was and what had happened in the past on the streets. It was risky to even step out of Tim's house but he couldn't have said no. He had promised to get better through a kiss, a wish he wanted to fulfill, not necessarily for himself but for the people around him.. for Tim. For him because he was the only person who was left, who cared, who loved and who didn't hate him for his crime. 

"There is something. Tell me I don't care if you've said it a million times before."

They stopped at the end of the park where a huge fence enclosed a certain area in which a small playground and a house were placed. It didn't look quite welcoming, rather cold and abandoned, yet a few voices could be heard. Light and filled with laughter.

"I just... Nevermind. I just have to adjust to this whole going out again thing..."

He didn't want to explain any further since it wouldn't lead to a solution and stepped away from his savior to touch the cold fence with his even colder hand. Through his sunglasses he blinked at the swing and the sandbox, imprints of shoes visible. So tiny, his heart sunk in his chest, remembering the daughter he never met. Tim remained behind him, watched as Avi leaned his forehead against the fence and sighed in desperation.

"You know...I wish it could've been different..."

"It?"

"My past.."

The wind became softer, barely noticeable on their skin, still Avi rolled down his sleeves and gulped.

"You have no idea how I wish I could've prevented it. I have dreams about them. Our small family strolling through the park, me holding our daughter in my arms as she smiles and yells in excitement. How we would do anything together, us against the world you might say. How she looks up to me, showing her drawings which I proudly put onto the fridge. How I would wait in the car for her to storm out of kindergarten, a happy expression on her face. How she would spend time with her mom when I was at work, both of them drawing and singing and dancing together..."

He got lost in his thoughts and stopped talking, tears streaming down his face, the sunglasses couldn't cover up the sadness within the man, mourning over the dead. Tim's heart ached, knowing that even though Avi loved him and even though they were together, he would never be able to change his mindset and memories. It wasn't possible to erase the past to create space for the future and that saddened the slightly taller man.

"I miss them... I miss my baby girl. Why was I never allowed to see her?"

Avi turned around and buried his face into Tim's shoulder, his arms holding onto the fabric of the man's shirt, staining it with tears which never seemed to stop. Tim put his arms around the broken figure, hugged him tight and kissed his beanie repeatedly, speaking words of encouragment and love, all being unheard by the clouded mind and shattered heart of the bass.
Standing in the park, in front of a fence, crying and trying not to scream at the world created an aura Tim had never felt before. He couldn't explain what it was but it felt like a ghost, caressing your cheek and the closing your eyes for eternity. 

"Why are you crying?"

Freezing on the spot, neither Tim nor Avi knew where the sound came from. A high pitched voice, a tiny girl's asking for their attention and an answer to her question. Searching with his eyes Tim looked at his surroundings without moving too much, his glimpse finally fell onto a child, holding out a small flower, her eyes shining in a beautiful shade of green with specks of brown in them. As soon as Tim recognized her he winked and rubbed Avi's back, loosening the embrace with which he had encaptured his lover. 

"I want to introduce you to someone.."

Avi bit his bottom lip, not knowing who the child was, and slowly turned around, green eyes meeting his own. His mouth hung open, not able to form any words.

"This flower is for you. Please don't cry anymore, sir."

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#Yanie PTXSLMJ I love you