I am?

N 2

N for Nothing

Sometimes I feel like I am being left behind. Alone. Missing out. But then I have always been feeling that way. So what do I do?

Disconnect myself and play games like a lifeless person. I do that so often that at some times I would lay down and just feel the emptiness and whole hollow weight pulling me down.

I haven't really realize it but, I'm bad at keeping relationships or even have a close one. Unless they play some sort of a game with me, I'll lose touch with them because I just don't interact.

Yes, I know I have brought this on myself. There's no way I can actually fix it. iPhones have this screentime that tells you how much time you spend. 7 hours per day last week, it went up 1 more hour this week. One day, I'll look back and hate myself since I waste all my life doing useless stuff.

Then again, what else could I do to fill up the empty space? Even if it makes me feel worse in the end, it still does the job. I want to feel some feelings though.