Journey | Yogscast Lewis x Reader

17 - Awkward Talks, ft. Alex Smith

You hear yourself say, "No", not registering it until seconds afterwards. And then your body responds, moving away.

Smith stays silent for a moment, imploringly blue eyes searching yours. 

Then he says, "There's someone else?"

How are you going to answer that - I mean, is there? 

You say, "Yes, I think so."

"Who?"

You exhale. "I think you can work it out."

His hands are still outstretched towards your shoulders, where they were just seconds ago. And the sight makes you feel guilty, as if you've betrayed him somehow - but you feel like you've done the right thing.

"Hey," he says, hanging his head slightly. "Sorry for all this. I should have realised."

You swallow. "Don't worry about it. We can forget it all."

"No," he says. "I wasn't thinking straight. I mean -"

"(Y/N)!"

The door opens abruptly, and Duncan's head appears, followed by Lewis'.

"You said you'd be - oh."

Immediately, you feel pinpricks of heat explode across your skin.

"Sorry," you murmur, stepping away from Alex, who seems to get the message, and does the same.

"We were worried," Duncan says. "You said you'd be in the common room."

"Yeah, sorry," you say tiredly, trying your hardest not to look at Smith. "Let's go."

"See you tomorrow, I guess?" Smith says, his voice ever so slightly strained.

You turn, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. "Yeah, see you Smith."

______________________________________________

The ride home's awkward.

You try your best to get them talking, make it seem like nothing happened back at the office; but all you get is mono-syllabic responses.

And it gets even more awkward when you drop Duncan off first, leaving just you and Lewis next to you in the car.

"How was the journey back?" you ask, trying to urge him into a conversation.

"Alright, I guess," he says half-heartedly. "You?"

You shrug. "Yeah, okay. The lads're actually not too hard to hang out with when they're too tired to lift a finger."

He laughs. "Yeah, I can imagine." He touches a hand to his forehead. "Fuckin' hell, I should really consider quitting gin..."

You smile, glad you've finally managed to get him talking to you again. "You better had, you fucking idiot. You were so pissed last night, you know..."

He grins a little painfully. "I can tell. I can't remember a thing." 

Your stomach jolts as you remember what happened with Lewis again.

"Not really surprised," you say. "Do you want me to drop you off outside, or what?"

"Sure," he says, unbuckling his seatbelt, hoisting his bags over his shoulder with a grunt of effort. "See you tomorrow."

"Yeah, take care."

You watch him carefully as he opens the door, places one foot on the pavement, and then he turns, and looks you right in the eyes - you can't help but flinch.