Evangeline P.O.V
Despite the two weeks of working with Damon in his so called plan-I have not figured out yet- I find myself unable to sleep these nights. I use to sleep peacefully knowing that the next day I was going to take on the world with one goal in my mind. And that was Jeremy and Elena. But now that some part of that support I built was gone.
I can't find a way to give myself a new meaning. Because that's all I've been doing all my life. Just trying to protect the people I love. Now that, that was gone... I don't have any agenda left to keep my mind on point. It useless. Its like my mind is slowly unravelling. Maybe the pain of heartbreak and betrayal is taking its toll on me.
But I fear that if I am unable to get back on track... I won't be able to protect myself or Jeremy from the dangers. That's why Jeremy left last night. Hes in whitmore, probably getting new friends and living the life he needed. Me? Well I'm pulling hard am I? I'm pulling all the strings as tight as I can.
But like I said, its growing pointless. I can't lie and say Damon's being here was not a distraction for me. It was. And in some way I was grateful. I was grateful Damon-although he's an ass- gives me trouble that I have to clean up. It distracts me from the pain that nest in my heart.
That pain where I know will never fade. I don't know what Damon wants from me. Although he is cocky and plans to be the master mind of things, I've grown to withstand his arrogant ass these days. He bothers me with his annoying tactics and I bother him with mine.
It was a win win situation. We're not friends. We're more like, business partners. Particularly one of them is forced to work with the other. I.E. me. Damon may be mean-okay he's always mean- but deep inside I know he's the brother Stefan once loved. Maybe all that went out the window when Katherine died.
Who knows, maybe that changed Stefan too. I don't blame how he turned out. I didn't turn out all that great either. I guess everyone's not perfect. Stefan still tries to talk to me but I always turn the other direction. Elena is mad that Jeremy left without saying goodbye since she was at Stefan's for two weeks.
I didnt care though. I carried her burden for years. Was it bad I just wanted time with myself? Alaric is dating Jenna. Yay for that. The only good news around here. And let me tell you, he is not happy with the deal I made with Damon that's why he was helping me too. I guess in a way, Alaric really wants to help me forget this dark part of my life. And I welcome his help.
Damon and Stefan just barely reached speaking terms. They can finally communicate with each other without breaking a table. Most of the time it happens at my house. Because of that I always have to be the referee to break them out.
First time I did that gave me a concussion. Prior to Damon. Since Stefan was knocked out, Damon was forced to feed my his blood since he claimed: "You're not dying yet, I still have lots of plans for you,"
Insulting much? I hit him in the head with the broken table stick when he said that. Everytime I feel at peace he comes around and disrupts that. Always giving me new job to do. Annoying really. What can I say? I made a deal. And I always keep my promises. Even if that meant I have to spend months with the annoying Salvatore that makes me want to rip my hair off every time he speaks.
~Evangeline Gilbert, out
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