If the Marauders texted 3

12 Days of Marauders Christmas: Why Can't We Count

Sirius- Does anyone actually remember the 22 Days of Christmas song we did last year?

Remus- 22 Dear Merlin

James- I think you mean DEER Merlin

James- ha ha love me please ha ha

Sirius- I meant 23 please don't

Sirius- 13

Sirius- Merlin's beard

Sirius- 12

Peter- Wow has it really been a year

Remus- Yeah, so much has changed

Remus- Last year we could count

Remus-
A pheonix in a pear tree
2 chocolate frog cards
3 Magic wands
(Well, we could almost count)

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
5 golden things
(J-You skipped four and sang it like it was four. Not to mention "golden things")

On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
4 Marauders
(J- That was sung like "Five golden rings". Why?
S- It's more like 🎵James please shut up🎵)
(We can could up to three and past six)

6 Bertie Bott's Ever Flavour Beans
7 years at Hogwarts
8 wet start fireworks
9 butterbeers
Ten (suddenly it's spelled not numbered) muggle carols
11 essays due back the day after break to several teachers who hate kids
12 books on writing carols

Instead of two owls (which still haven't left), four turtle doves, two French hens, two calling birds, a complaint about how rings may be birds, six geese, seven swans, some spoiled milk, a video Marlene and Lily are going to regret if it is ever seen by anyone not in Gryffindor (Well, maybe only Lily will regret it), two shitty ideas and a false promise, a failed Christmas carol, and some "music" from James and Sirius. All based off of a fairly easy numerical song.

Yeah, much has changed.

Sirius- Your ass/shade/attitude is not appreciated

James- what Sirius you don't appreciate Remus's ass

James- Well that solves the "who's top/who's bottom" bet I had with Peter

Peter- Speaking of, you know what else has changed

Remus- No don't say it

Sirius- I swear, I meant sass

James- Care to do the honors, Wormtail?

Peter- Sirius has a boyfriend

Sirius- no don't

Peter- and it's Remus

James- Who else would it be?

Peter- Probably Snape

Sirius- How dare you even say an idea like that

Peter- because it's funny

Remus- Well , it is funny

Sirius- I hate you and hope that sentence backfires on you for siding with Peter and you end up with someone you hate just as much as I hate you

Remus- That's not what you said last night

James- WOAH religious holiday here folks remember JESUS LOVES YOU even if you choose to let your FRIENDS KNOW YOU SIN

Sirius- James, you are Hindu

James- Eh, my mom is. I'm more atheist

Sirius- then WHY DO YOU CARE

James- I'm just concerned about you two REMEBER TO USE PROTECTION

Remus- please don't do this now

Remus- Can't we all remember the spirit of Christmas

Peter- Well, considering the Church usually frowns upon witchcraft so I have literally never stepped foot in a church or touched a Bible, no

Remus- Just be nice to people and love one another

Sirius- Says the person who disdained our counting skills

Remus- Oh mY GosH this conversation is over

_________________________________________

James, Sirius, Remus, & Peter- Happy Christmas!

Sirius- Or boxing day depending on where you live

Remus- Or a late Hanukkah, which started yesterday

James- Or what ever you celebrate!

Peter- Yay!