Can I Be Him? ♢ Trevor Cash - Over Atlantic ♢✅

Confessions part 2 (17)

Violet's pov
"There was this girl that I was with for a little more than half a year. We didn't know each other a long time but we started going out anyway. I met her at one of my shows with the band I was in before OA. We were together three months and then I went to L.A. for another three with the boys, leaving her behind. I really liked her in the start. I was crazy for her. But the more time we spent together the colder she was getting. She didn't want cuddles. She didn't want kisses. There has to be people watching us in order to do that or for instagram pictures. I was wondering why but wherever my friends were telling me that she just wanted me for the fame I didn't believe them. I couldn't because I didn't want to. As I said before I was crazy for her so I just ignored them and especially when they said that she was cheating on me and kept on believing she was only mine. I left for L.A. with heavy heart. I was texting her all the time but she was nearly replying and when she did her replies were so cute and warm and I was feeling loved. When I went back to Missouri she didn't come to the airport cause she 'knew that I'd be tired and she didn't want to bother me so she came the next day instead'. She was friendly and a little cuddly but just for a few days and then she went back to cold and distant. I hated this but I really liked her so I was trying to ignore it. A few days after we flew to England I learned the truth I already knew but this time there was proof. My friends sent me a video and some photos. Lying to my self made me believe that she really liked me and that we would last. But now that I'm looking back I realise how wrong I was and mostly stupid. I don't know why it still bothers me so much especially now that I know I don't care about her anymore and how not for me she was. I think I am hurt the most because I've been betrayed thousands of times before and this keeps happening all the time. This is why I'm like that. And I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like I hated you or I've been mean to you but I can't control it. I try to stay away from people so that I won't get hurt again.". He started to form tears in his eyes so I just gave him a giant hug without saying anything. I felt tears on my shoulder and then I knew it was my time to speak. "I get that it hurts but just think that some people has more important problems. Be glad it's only this and you shouldn't care for that. It's their loss not yours. You're worth way more than her." "its not it. I'm tired. Very tired. Its not just girls everyone rejects me. I'm losing friends all the time. People are hating on me for no reason. You don't know how bad it feels. You never will." "You really think that I don't know?" "You have a story too right?" "Everyone has one no one or just a few people knows and they don't talk about" "go ahead then. I told you mine. Now tell me yours" "I'm really scared. I don't think I can do it. I'm sorry... I wish I could but it's really hard." "I don't judge. You can say it whatever it is" "it's not that you'll judge me. I'm just afraid I will lose you, your trust and everything and I love spending time with you" "how bad can it be?" "Very if you're like them" "who is them? And I guess I'm not. I promise you that everything will be the same. I love spending time with you too and nothing will never change that. I promise"

Trevor's pov
I pulled out of the hug and took her hand. She looked at me, then on the ground and then she started to play with the end of her jumper with her spare hand. After a little time she took a deep breath and started talking. "It all started on primary school. Everyone was laughing at me because I always was the one signing everywhere and with every chance I had. I was always the one who was unable to draw inside the lines or dress a doll properly. Also I was quite punk from a young age and I was always always wearing extensions with colours. You know the small pieces of hair for the kids. This was giving them reasons to laugh at me. Because I was different. Things were getting better the more the time was passing until something happened" she suddenly stopped and a tear rolled down her cheek. I squeezed her hand a little and caught it with both my hands. Then was a dead silence... "I don't live with my real dad. He left mum when my brother was a couple months old and ever since she is with someone else. But when he came back he made sure to leave his 'stain'." "Why are you showing you?" "Cause I was a mistake. A mistake mom wished never happened but not because it's me but because I'm one more thing that connects her with him. She doesn't hate me thought. She treats us all the same and she is the best mom anyone could ask for. She is my best friend. She is amazing. She really loves me" "then what's the problem?" "The problem isn't inside the family but outside. My real dad committed a few successful murders and some unsuccessful and soon he went to the jail for that. He was in the news so everyone saw it and the kids found it funny and entertaining to... remind me of that and... laugh at me more... In the start it was fine but then... it started to annoy me. The teachers talked to the kids about it and it stopped... Years later around 6th grade one of the teachers referred to him as an example for something and one of them remembered. He... yelled 'that's Violet's dad'. The others started asking if that's true and the teacher said that it didn't matter but they couldn't stop talking about it and wonder. Some time during the class.. someone said 'wait. Since Violet's dad is a killer... doesn't that mean... that she has killer's blood running in her... veins?... Isn't she... dangerous?' He said it... so calm and as... it was nothing... Since then everyone started to call me... names with... 'Murderer's daughter'... being the most known. Everyone called me like that... I Started being bullied and I couldn't handle it any...more. All those words and... everything. I lost my friends. Everyone was scared of me. This went on for more than... a year. Dayl fought with the most of the scho...ol and after that mom finally changed me... I was so scared if anyone would find out in the new school. I can't... erase these scars..." I let go off her hand and pulled her in a very tight hug. She warped her hands around me and rested her head on my shoulder. This broke my heart. How could someone be that stupid to actually believe this thing? How can someone be like that? How can someone think that she is dangerous or something? They don't know what they lost. She is amazing. They're so stupid for so many reasons. "I would never change the way I think for you because of something that stupid. I'm not an idiot like them and I never will be". I said as I felt tears rolling down all the way from her
cheek to my shirt but I didn't mind. Crying is good when you are like that...

*I didn't get the killer part of my mind Dayl's real father was indeed in Jail and what I said is true. But the "murder in her veins" part is obviously stupid and I used it just to make the story. Thirdly and lastly thank you so much for 1.10k views! It means a lot know in that there are people who actually reads my book and special thanks to everyone voting/commenting. I really hope you like the story so far. Keep reading/voting/add the book at your libraries-Lists to be notified when I update and hopefully I'll see you in the next chapter and let's try to get it to 1.20k views by then! It will mean a lot🙈💕*