The Inner Critic [Completed]

Under my smile

Under my smile lies a broken heart
Not from a boy, but from someone who has broken it more than twice
Under my smile is something that's been torn apart
And I know I'm not being nice

I know I am not being nice when I say this:
I've been through too much to continue feeling this way
It isn't right and it isn't something I miss
And under my smile, I'll continue feeling this way even though I'd rather from this feeling stray

So, although you see a smile, there's much more hidden under there
Although you see a smile, I am not really smiling inside
If you would like to know what's hidden under my smile, just ask and it'll show that you care
Because I don't want this feeling to hide

So, under my smile lies a bunch of non-cried tears
Under my smile is where all of my too hard to talk about secrets are
Under my smile is where all my buried secrets have been all these years
Because I don't want to open up and be thrown very far

I don't mean that in the literal sense, and I hope you know that to be true
I just want people to know that not every smile I smile is a smile that contains a real smile
Because I've been through hell and back and I don't know if you'll understand me too
Plus, it has been a while

It's been a while since I opened up and showed you the real me
Because the real me might be scary for some
That's probably why I don't open up to anyone, see?
Because they might not like the real me and/or call me dumb

Of course, they won't call me dumb, but maybe they will(?)
Because who knows what today's society can do to a human like me?
They might torture, and they might kill
Not with actions, but with words and that hurts more than anyone can see

So, the real me hides behind a smile for several reasons
And what hides behind my smile might not be pleasant for anyone
So, I hide behind a smile because of possible treason
And so don't hurt me because then that'll be added to what's already been done