Torn (harry styles)

16- That Bad Day

I snatched my pyjama bottoms and slipped them on, then grabbed my duvet and pulled it over me. My heart was still racing and my cheeks now probably the colour of tomatoes. It's going to be awkward for me next time I see Harry, I can't believe what I just dreamed. He really does have a sexy way of getting into my head. He's just so hot, I'm not going to deny it anymore.

I really hope he doesn't go back to mean Harry next time I see him, I like nice Harry... He's nice. And I like him.

Oh hell with it, I like either one...

I either wish Harry would nice to me and we could be friends, or just get out of my life. It's not fair on me for him to mess me around like this...

I think there's more to him, maybe he has problems at home? Maybe he is just a broken soul who doesn't let people in? Maybe he has trouble making friends? Maybe.

Anyway, I'm so glad it's the weekend- I need time away from it all.

Something I'm surprised about is that since all this Harry shit, I haven't even thought about Dexter, maybe it's about time I did.

Dexter is my ex boyfriend... He's not nice. We broke up just over 2 months ago. About 3 weeks before the party I went to where Harry humiliated me. So I guess that's another reason why it got to me so much; I was in a bad place with boys.

Anyway, Dexter cheated on me.. With this girl called Paige. I don't like her at all. I'm surprised I haven't thought about that day recently. When it first happened I always thought about it. Always. It got to me so much, it destroyed any faith in boys, it demolished my ability to trust. It made me question my sexuality because I hated boys so much... But Harry has definitely reassured me what I am. I want him badly... He's so hot, and just so fucking sexy....
Snap the fuck out of it and think about Dexter! God, it's like Dexter doesn't even matter anymore, like it wasn't a big deal. It was a big deal... Then.

So Dexter and me were quite serious, we had been dating for 8 months before it happened, I liked him so much. I haven't had sex with him though, I know that he wanted to. I just didn't feel ready for it at the time...He made me feel so small and insignificant, like every boy is just trying to play me. I hate thinking of that day.

*flashback*

Dexter hasn't answered his phone in so long, I guess he's busy. It's been all day and it's now 6'o'clock. We had made a vague plan to meet, but I guess he forgot and is busy. Oh well, I'm sure he's okay. It just worries me a bit because he usually does answer. I'm not a possessive girlfriend and I'm not going to be angry at him or anything because it's his life and he can do what he wants, it's just we had sort of arranged to meet. I'm sure he had something more important.
I'm walking past his house now on my way to town, I can't tell whether he's in there though.
*ring ring, ring ring.*

My phone rang, it's him.

"Hello!" I answered cheerfully.

*heavy male breathing*
"Uhhhh, shit." He breathed, that's definitely his voice.
He sounds like he could be in pain? His voice is thick and wiry. I hope he's alright, I would hate for something bad to happen.
"Dexter?" I spoke loud and clearly into the phone...

The heavy breathing continued, he probably pocket dialled. Either way were meant to be meeting and I'm outside his house so maybe I should just knock for him?

I kept the phone to my ear, repeating his name into it, hoping for an answer which never came. When I reached his door, I knocked it gently.

"Fuck..." He breathed, I could hear him on the phone.
"Wait babe, stop a sec.. I think there's someone at the door." He spoke weakly, what's going on?
" ugh, is it your fucking girlfriend? You said you had told her you were cancelling?" A female voice piped in, what the fuck is this.
"I told you before she's not my girlfriend, she just thinks she is! It's all part of the joke, I just haven't broke the news to her yet."