Torn (harry styles)

18- So Little Time

Our bench.

The words still rang in my head. I'm confused, so confused. Does he want to be mean to me? What does he want... I wish I knew.

I thought the whole way home, as it drew nearer 7pm the nervous/excited feeling rose in my stomach. I don't know what to think, I don't know how I should be feeling about all of this. Maybe I should be disgusted that after everything mean he's done to me- I'm still excited to meet him. Yeah, that's how I SHOULD feel. I should feel like he's playing me, and that I'm wasting my time. I shouldn't go, I should just stay at home. Why should he be able to talk to me one day, and not the next? Why should I let him treat me like complete shit, then kiss me, then ignore me then ask to meet me? No... It's not okay. I don't want to be treated like that. My mum told me never to let a boy toy with my emotions, and Harry is doing exactly that. This is not on.

I'm not going.

Why should I? It's not fair. I'd like to see what he would do, if I treated him the way he treated me... I bet he wouldn't come to the bench.. No way would he. So why do I feel like I'm in the wrong? Why do I feel like I'm standing him up? I am... But he deserves it... Right?

It's now 7:40... If I were going, I would be leaving now... But I'm not going, so I can just stay in bed.

I lay in bed, counting down the minutes to 7pm. When the clock hit 7, an uneasy sick feeling rose in my throat. My stomach felt empty and hollow. My bed felt hard and uncomfortable underneath me and I just felt out of place.

I wonder if Harry is there now, waiting for me... Looking for me. My eyes prickled with tears slightly but I blinked them back. I'm doing the right thing, aren't I? Yeah... I am.

Maybe it was a joke? Maybe he was planning to meet me and then not show up so then I would be waiting there like a loner.

No... Harry wouldn't do that. Would he? He seems like the type that would..but I get a feeling he wouldn't. Hang on, I barely even know him.

7:20. If he was there, he's probably gone now. I feel so bad. My forehead felt sticky and my fingers clenched the duvet. 'Our bench' I should have gone. I know I had good reason not to, but I had nothing else to do. And I hate to admit it, but I would have really wanted to meet him.

I do really want to meet him. I don't even know why I'm lying here still.

If I leave now and run maybe he'll still be there?

In an instant, I jumped out of bed and tugged on some jeans and a jumper. I don't care what I look like, I really don't. I pulled my hair up into a messy bun and ran out if my door. I'm really doing this.

When I reached the door I grabbed it and pulled it open, ready for the sprint.

"Skye?" My mums weak voice called quietly. Great...

"Yes what?" I said in an irritated tone which I didn't mean to come out so harsh.

"Sorry darling, could you possible get me a cup of tea? I'm parched." She replied, obviously hurt by my rude tone.

"Okay sure." I sighed, this is all going wrong.

I jogged into the kitchen and turned the kettle on, staring at the clock the whole time while I gathered the mug, tea bag, spoon and milk. I tapped my foot impatiently on the ground, and my heart rate quickened as I pictured Harry on his own, leaving 'our bench.'

When the kettle finished boiling I quickly poured it into the mug, splashing some boiling water onto my arm.

"Fuck!" I cursed. It burns. I ignored the stinging/burning pain as I poured some milk into the mug and stirred. Before running it into my mums room.

"Sorry about being rude before mum I'm just late to meet a friend, I'm meant to be at hers now." I said quickly, she gave me a knowing nod and thanked me for the tea. I then quickly ran out of my house and sprinted.

I don't know why I just lied to my mum, I never lie to her. With my ex dexter I always told her about pretty much everything. I don't know what's come over me, I could have just as easily said I was meeting this boy, she wouldn't have cared. I don't know why I lied, what's come over me.

Pieces of my hair fell loose as I ran down the road, but I don't care, I have to get there before he leaves. I looked down at my watch. 7:30... Is there any chance he might still be there? I hope so...

I'm about 5 minutes away from the bench now, I really hope he's there.

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Hey guys, sorry it's short. What do you all think so far? Any ideas, comment or message me. I love reading all your messages and ideas about what to happen next. I accept constructive criticism but please don't just be plain mean. I've already started working on the next chapter for this so there's a possibility of a double update. My friend Teagan came up with the idea of the tea, so part credit to her. She's also thinking of getting wattpad and writing her own story so if she does I'll give you guys her name. Thanks for reading, it means a lot! Love you all<3 xoxoxoxo