KHIP-HOP Mini Series

Gray 03

"He hurt me and it felt like true love."

It's been so long since I'd been to a show with AOMG performing, it must have been in there rookie days the last time I'd gone. It amazed me seeing just how many people came to see there show. 

They've made it so far. 

I had been debating with myself whether or not showing up unexpectedly would do us any good but I figured if I wanted us to head anywhere positive I'd rather just get it over with. I pushed through the crowd until I could head somewhere further up ahead where the stage was. In the corner of my eye I saw DJ Pumpkin and flashed him a smile, he had to do a double take clearly surprised I was here. 

He welcomed me and waved me over. "Oh wow! It's been forever." He pulls me into a hug, his over eagerness made me feel a bit queasy. 

"Where's Gray?" I ask.

He points towards the back of the curtain. "In the changing room." I nod and start heading over the direction he pointed me to. A loud song starts to play over the crowd which I recognize as one of Jay's songs. 

The crowd goes wild when he comes on stage but I don't stick around for much and head on over to the back. I see a few familiar faces but I continue to head onto the back where he'd be. Just as Pumpkin promised it was the last door that had his name on it. 

I tapped softly. 

Nothing, tapped again and waited. Sighing I pulled the door open just a bit and peered inside, I caught my breath when I noticed the reason why it was so quiet. 

Her beautiful pale skin seemed to radiate off him the further she dug her fingernails into his bare back, she wrapped her arms around him running her hands over his skin, his mouth was on hers before she could say anything, and they exchanged a heated kiss. 

My heart felt shattered, torn to bits, I could see all the things that made me love him fall and scatter into a million pieces. But what hurt me more was when her eyes pierced my own. Instead of looking away, she bit her lip to hide the smile that was creeping up on her face. He must have somehow sensed someone watching because he squeezed her hands and gave her a small smile of his own,turning his head to look over at my direction.

When he looked at me one of the first emotions that took over his composure was regret, but my eyes were busy reflection the stories of our youth, remembering the first day we met, how I fell completely and utterly in love with him, the next emotion that he exposed was ignorance, he released his hold on her.

His steps suddenly descending towards me, but he staggered a hand held out as if I'd take it. "Hey..."His voice sounds far away, I back away from the door, strands of hair are caught in his eye lashes and hide his true self from me.

 I can only shake my head in disbelief.

I wonder how many times had this happened. 

How many times had I been made the fool? 

I let out a chuckle which sounded more like a pained cry, "Wait." He pressed forward but I didn't want him near me, I didn't want him to touch me. He sickened me so I turned and stormed out the place. 

-

I didn't get very far outside until I felt his hand on my own spin me around and push me into his chest as he forcefully wrapped his arms around me, a hand cupping the back of my head. I hadn't noticed I was sobbing hysterically until his voice came like soft whispers. "Shh, don't cry." He'd repeat over and over, but I pushed him away from me with the palm of my hands using as much force as I could muster. 

"Stop." I demanded. 

I looked at him now, wiping my eyes. "Don't play the fucking victim." I snapped. 

Gray just stands there, he doesn't argue, nor does he make a point of denying what I had just seen. He doesn't look defeated, much less does it look like he regrets what just happened. I have the sudden urge to beat him til I'm out of breath...but I won't do it. I won't exert myself for him. I've done too much for him already. 

I waited for him...I kept waiting for him...and for what? This?

"You know how I am-" He speaks up. "It's just me...you know?" I scoff, rolling my eyes in disbelief. 

"I knew who you were." I restate. His eyes flash upwards to meet mine. "I used to know who you were." 

"Lisa..."

He reaches for me, his fingertips graze my cheeks but I look away, only the sensation is left. "You fucked me over." I hiss.

"No, no, no...Lisa baby, you know my heart is for you...those girls they're just girls to me...nothing more." I shake my head again. 

"How long?" The question startles him. "For how long?" I ask again. He recoils at the question. But suddenly we're not alone anymore. 

"A few months." She answers for him. 

"Yura-" Gray's eyes widen in disbelief. 

She links there hands together, standing side by side one another I can tell they belong for each other. I mean she was Korean after all, she'd be able to give him the kind of things I couldn't. I never should have fooled myself into believing he'd be with me in the future. 

"You can have him." I tell Yura before turning to leave. 

My chest begins to hurt, he calls for me several times, the cold wind makes this night only worse, but I don't look back. Instead with this broken heart of mine I seek refuge into this cold night. 

-to be continued-