Yesterday's Devil

Chapter 39

Kyungsoo

After I had cleaned myself and Jongin had fallen asleep on the couch, I decided to make dinner.
I felt bad.
There was a secret less between us, but I still lied to him about killing. I didn't kill people for my job, but I did kill one of Kris' men. I won't ever tell him though.

I walked over to the couch and looked at Jongin's sleeping body, while kneeling down. This guy was so innocent. He won't ever forgive me if he knew what I've done.
It was selfish, but I couldn't let him go.
He deserved more than I could ever be and still I refused to let him go.

"Jongin?" I carefully wiped a few strands of hair out of his face. "Wake up."

As he didn't react I softly touched his cheek. "Wake up baby."

Jongin's eyes fluttered open. He blinked a few times before asking, "what is it?"

"I made you dinner, you must be hungry." I stood up and watched how he rubbed his eyes, before sitting up.
The skin around his eye was deep purple now and swollen.
He followed me to the kitchen and sat down.

"How do you feel?" I asked as I stared at him intently.

"I'm fine." He assured me before gulping down the water I had given him.

"Wait! You should take some painkillers, that's why I gave you water." I quickly handed him some.

"Oh, thank you." He swallowed them and started eating.

My phone vibrated, so I took it out and saw I received a new message.

Unknown number: You'll regret this

I looked up at Jongin and thought about how it was all my fault he was in pain now. Just like a lot of things were my fault.
I wanted to tell him how sorry I was, but swallowed the words.

He finished eating and looked at me, "why are you staring at me?"
His voice snapped me out of my thoughts, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." He yawned and looked back at me. "I'm tired."

"I know. You should sleep." I watched as he raised from his chair, still looking at me. "Aren't you coming?"

It surprised me how he acted like I didn't confess something to him. Like it was just a normal evening.
As we walked up the stairs I felt heavy. What if Jongin actually was a bit scared of me now? I didn't want that. I would never hurt him.

"Why are you looking so gloomy?" He asked me as he climbed on the bed and under the sheets. "Something wrong?"

"Jongin, everything is wrong right now." I laid down next to him. "Except you."

He flashed me a small smile before he laid eyes on my body. "Why are you wearing a shirt?"

"Why? Can't I?" I asked as I looked away.

"Of course you can, it's just that you never do." He touched my chin with his index finger before saying, "take it off."

"I don't want to." I kept insisting. He was right though, ever since we started dating we slept in just our underwear.

"You are acting weird." He forced me to look at him, but I avoided eye contact. "Soo."

I slapped his hand away, "no, I'm not."

"Yes you are." Jongin pushed me down on the bed and sat on top of me. "Take it off."

"Jongin get off of me," I tried to push him away, but he was very strong. The worst thing was that I was getting hard, since he was moving heavily on my crotch. "Please."