Why did god take you away from me. Justin Bieber & Kendall Jenner

5.

Brittany's Pov~~*
*Next Day*

When i returned home from the beach yesterday, i just burst through the doors, and ran up here to my room, and locked myself in here, crying all day, and all night, i didn't even get any sleep at all. Justin prob think's i'm a freak because i stay in here, thinks that because the rest of the people in here have familes that visit them and write to them, and i have no one, but i don't see why that makes me different from anyone them, Don't get why i deserved this, i don't know why i deserved this shit i'm getting, and i just want it to stop, and its not gonna, life doesn't go my way, but what have i done that's so terrible to be bullied and toutured like this.

Last night i could hear them laughing down stairs while i was locked up in here in the dark room. Could hear them talk about me, and say all this mean stuff, not caring that i heard it, and that it made me cry and self harm that night. If any of them found all out i self harm, then they'll just take the piss out of me for that, calling me razor wrist Brittany or something like that, and they'd prob blame me for doing it for attention, i ain't an attention seeker, i don't do it because of that, i do it because of all the things i go through, and it helps me, so its important that i don't tell anyone.

Justin has left me several messages, saying he wants to talk to me and shit. Why is he even wasting his time texting me, why does he want to talk to me, it just doesn't add up, does he want to take the piss out of me with his friends, well they can be my guest, i don't give a shit when i'm used to it everyday. They have to ruin every moment for me, i was finally having fun with Justin yesterday at the beach, and then Lindsay waltz in and ruins it for me, she ruins a lot of things for me, so i tend to just not try and enjoy myself, she says i don't deserve to have any of it.

Right now i'm in this depressing room, sitting in the dark, with my hands wrapped around my legs, crying, and just feeling sorry for myself. I still feel embarrassed about yesterday, and ashamed of who i am, i'm always gonna be a laughing stock.

"Brittany come on out please, its three in the afternoon, you've been in there all day, do you want to talk about it, i'm all ears here, you haven't had anything to eat, come on out, everyones out and away anyway, so its just you, me, and the other workers."

I heard Jill say while she kept knocking on my door, i feel like i should talk to her about things, i always do, and she always listens to me and understands my pain, and what i go through, because she was sort of similar when she was my age, her mum died, and her dad went into prison, so she was put in care, but she was only bullied at school, unlike me who's bullied there and here. I pulled myself of my bed, and stumbled my way to the door, and opened it. Jill threw me into a quick hug.

Jill: come on, i'm taking you downstairs for something to eat, and we're gonna talk.

I nodded, has she patted my back has we made our way down the stair case, one we walked into the living room, it was a mess, alcohol bottles everywhere, ciggerettes, and can't mention the stink, the rest of the carers were cleaning it up.

Brittany: this from last night

Jill: yep see i don't know why they can't clean up from themselves, and plus where did they even get alcohol and ciggerettes from, we've been cleaning the living room and kitchen all day, and everyone left before we could give them a talk about this, so they'll be getting into some trouble, i know you were in your room all last night, because you didn't come out all yesterday when you came back from the beach.

Brittany: i had my reasons.

Jill: lets go through to the kitchen and talk, more cleaner in there.