SyntheticHeart's Poems and Songs

Not-So Irrational Now (Poem)

I recall the exact second my weak heart broke
Words tore deep into my soul and awoke
A part of me that has not been revealed in years
Confirming every one of my irrational fears

My muscles are weak, I can't even write
My classmate looks to me with concern... "Are you alright?"
In my mind I scream "I am not worth your worries!"
But I manage to say in a squeaking whisper "Yeah, I'm fine."

As I read and read again I stop over... She, she, she...
Could this really be me?
But the words she speak is true
Maybe it was not worth the sacrifices I made for you

Through all of this, my love for you is still there
So I hope that he will treat you with love and care
The love that I hesitated to show
The love I will learn to feel alone

I need to make the most of this heartbreak
This time, I won't hesitate
To show my honest love for
Not you now, but my mother

Because she tried so hard to save me
And I threw it in her face, I was so mean
But I will never tell her she was right
It is not worth another fight

I will still be here if you ever need me
I won't let my love for you shape me
If you ever need my help I will still be there
Because I still do truly care

Just because you rejected me
Doesn't mean I hate you, I hope you see
I will learn to love like a sister
Or a friend, just not a lover

Maybe you are right,
Just as my mother was right,
I am nowhere near lovable
And I am easily replaceable