SyntheticHeart's Poems and Songs

Grateful (Poem)

It's strange to say I seek the satisfaction of blood dripping from my flesh.

It's been so damn long since I've experienced such relief.

But I know that in the end, I'll just feel empty.

So instead I seek the thrill of chasing after success

struggling to grasp what will always be beyond my reach,

though every step I take fills me with adrenaline nonetheless.

When I look back, I'm filled with a sense of pride,

Recalling how often I resisted the temptation to take a step back.

When I let my letters burn, when I threw my razors away.

When I denied that drink, that cigarette, that pill.

But there's still that haunting thought lingering in the back of my mind.

Reminding me of the times that I did step back.

Telling me that I failed high school not because I wasn't capable of success,

but because I refused to press forward.

That I chose to skip that class, to tell that lie.

But all that matters is that I redeemed myself, and I'm continuing to redeem myself every day.

When the path to traditional graduation crumbled, I found another path and pressed on.

When I found myself with bloodied hands, I realized how important loved ones are to me.

When friendships fell apart, I learned from my failure and changed for the better.

And in the end, that's all that matters.

I was once in a very dark place, but there is no point in looking back,

when the present and future are so much brighter.

Now, I'm ready for everything adulthood has to throw at me.

And I am so grateful for the friends and even the enemies that have brought me to this point.