Control (Evak & Philkas)

Chapter twenty-eight: Though love

  Taking care of Even wasn't easy. Isak knew it wouldn't be easy. He's not an idiot. Just, he didn't think it would we this difficult, that it would take so much of his energy. 

Saturday was tough. Even stayed in bed all day and refused to eat despite Isak's many tries. He even refused cheese toasties. Isak was scared for Even's health - who knows when was the last time he ate? - but, what else could he do? He can't force food down his throat. 

Isak ran his fingers trough Even's hair, rubbed his back and held him tight. He made him feel loved and important. Every touch meant a silent statement, a silent promise. 

You're not alone. 

You are important to me. 

We're gonna get trough this, together.  

I can't really understand what you are feeling but I'll try my best to help you. 

I'll listen if you want to talk. 

I love you. 

I'm not going to leave you or abandon you.

Some earned a reaction from the older boy. His grip tightening on Isak's hand or simply scooting closer to him under the covers. 

Gabe knocked on his door while Even was asleep. His eyes searched for Isak trough the darkness and moved his head to say 'follow me'. 

With a small sigh, Isak reluctantly left his bed, caressing Even's cheek with his thumb as a silent promise to come back. He hasn't left Even's side a lot since Philip brought him here other than for quick bathroom trips and to get food from the kitchen. He hasn't showered last night and probably stinks but, whatever. He can shower later. 

As he made his way to the kitchen, Isak noticed Helen's jeep wasn't in the driveway and Philip's shoes were missing. Where did they go? 

''Sit.'' 

His head turned at the sound of Gabe's voice. He was sitting at the kitchen table, his laptop in front of him. Isak still doesn't understand why Gabe always works in the kitchen when he has an office in the back of the house. 

Isak sat down in front of his foster dad. ''What is it?'' he asked, wondering why Gabe wanted to talk to him. 

''Helen left with Philip to see Even's parents to talk about last night. Did you know they called the police last night saying their eighteen years old son was missing and could be in danger. That his life could be in danger.''

Don't you have to wait forty-height hours to signal a missing person? 

''When Helen came home, Philip told her what happened and she called Even's parents to reassure them that their son was fine and sleeping in your bed. They gave him permission to stay the night but, he needs to go back home.''

''I can take care of him.'' 

Gabe shook his head, feeling bad for crushing Isak's hopes. ''I don't think so. This is a big responsibility, I don't think you're ready for that. He tried to commit suicide.'' 

Isak held his breath at the word suicide. He doesn't want to think about it again, ever. He never wants to re-live last night but after Even's pillow talk confession, he's afraid he'll try again. 

''Even's okay now.'' 

''He's not, Isak. Even needs to be on suicide watch and see his therapist. He needs to take his medications or he'll go off the rails again. This is a serious illness.'' 

He knows that. He knows but, he can't just tell Even to leave. Isak told him countless time that he wasn't going to leave him. Asking him to go home will contradict his promises and it'll crush him.