Love Of A Teenage Girl ✔️

| Epilogue |

Dear Diary,

Recently, I've been feeling happy, free and light spirited. I've learnt from my old experience many things.

Reality is, you can never forget your first love cause first love never fades away. He will always have a particular place in your heart that will never be replaced with anyone you'll meet in life. You will always remember a bit of him every time you try to love someone new. Don't be afraid, because it's normal. Remembering the past doesn't mean you're still in love with him, but it means you're able to recall the lessons life has taught you and the things that made you stronger. That's the beauty of remembering, you can choose to look at the brighter side of life. The love you have felt with him will eventually fade, but the lessons will forever stay. So the next time you remember your first love, be grateful. Because it shows you are better and much stronger right now.

But you know what's truly fucked up?

That you can be without someone for six months, a year, five years, and have mastered not thinking about them, but no matter how much time passes there will always be that moment where you see a photo of them, or catch a little of their cologne in a crowded busy street and suddenly you're plagued with a rapidly sinking stomach as all the memories come rushing back to your mind and the relentless question appears to your mind, "what did I ever do wrong to deserve this?".

I missed our friendship though, how much we used to talk, laugh and sing together. I missed how pure everything was before all of these complications coming between us but I guess it wasn't meant to be from the start. Some things get broken and they remain shattered into millions of pieces; no matter how much you try to fix them but there's no way to go back to where things used to be.

I don't even know why I've gotten so distant with everyone, maybe I need some time alone to process everything happening around me and that's okay. I sometimes recall the days where we would laugh till our faces turn blue all day long and sing awfully together, even though he hurt me in ways I can never describe but the good memories will forever stay in my heart and memory even if it sometimes destroys me to remember. I don't know what exactly happened but we've grown extremely distant from each other, I guess it's because no matter what but if one partner falls in love with the other than the friendship is shattered completely no matter how much you try to deny or fix it which devastates me and makes me feel that our friendship that I thought that it'll never break has become shattered, I may sound naïve but it's for the best honestly; I had to move passed this.

We were the two friends that never stopped talking, laughing and singing till some feelings came in the way, hurtful actions being done and just like that in a glimpse, it destroyed it all. I've always felt like it's my fault that I've got my feelings to interfere with our friendship which destroyed it but, at the end of the day, he could've tried to save it just like I always worked hard to keep it going. Maybe the friendship was one way too, I can't think straight anymore.

Honestly, I don't feel sorry for him anymore. A huge weight has been lifted off me because, instead of spending my time waiting around for him to come to his senses, I decided to move on with my life. I decided to live for me, it's not worth trying anymore.

There are the days when I miss you, but they don't cripple me like they used to. When I see something that reminds me of you, I think about sending you a message, just as a friend but I remember that I'm hurting myself that way and I should have the ability to choose myself. Trust me when I say, it takes quite a bit of effort not to hit send.

He said we would still be friends, but I think he meant we would be the the kind of strangers that share long lost memories and a quick smile every once in a while.

I hope the best for him and myself and I hope I find someone who makes me happy and loves me for who I am proudly, but the thing is, I don't think I'll be able to go through all this again but I'm sure in the most unexpected time, he will appear.

I'm glad I've learnt my lessons, became stronger, and ready than ever for everything that'll be thrown my way. I'm ready for something new, raw, and real.

Dear him,
You were my first love, and you always will be, but I don't collapse for you like I used to, and I never will. Together we wrote a novel and now that we've reached the last chapter all I can hope is for the chance to write book two but with somebody else. Thank you for always being here for me, and all the good memories we shared together, I owe you a lot. Thank you, because when I look back at our memories, I cry a little but my tears are neither sad or angry, they're the kind of tears that are followed by laughter, they're happy tears because even though you hurt me, I still stood up and fought through it, you taught me a lot. You showed me new things and made me happy some days, it was worth all the pain because I needed this before the start of something new. You taught me how to love someone unconditionally, you taught me to live in the moment, you showed me that not all guys are douchebags and some are sweet, caring, and loving. You also taught me how to stop loving someone when they're bad for me.
Most importantly, you showed me that not every love has to last forever, and that that's okay.
Your chapter in my book is over. It will forever be one of my favorites but I cannot keep rereading it... hoping for a different ending.

Thank you, to the first guy I've ever loved.

"We're friends forever. Remember?"

Love,

A Stranger Friend.

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Hey guys, Nadia here! Love Of A Teenage Girl is officially completed. I don't know what life brings, who knows I could even write a book two. Maybe with a new special someone. But for now, let's celebrate ending this book yay! I've felt generous lately so I decided to post an epilogue and I hope you guys like it! Thank you all for the huge support and encouragement! It means a lot and I'm glad you guys were there for me in this rollercoaster ride! Love you guys! Shoutout to my best friends and my Wattpad bffs cellowarrior13 , cheekyDIDIgiddy and _Joalabear_ for always supporting me and being there! Thank you to my most wonderful hardworking editor Samantha littaff she's amazing honestly! Hope you enjoyed the book. Thank you everybody!❤️