Saudade (Joshler)

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There will be bit of a TW on mentions of self harm at the beginning. Nothing major tho. It doesn't really go into any detail on it. Ok, hope you enjoy! (Play the song)

Tyler watched as the sign saying they were leaving Ohio approached. His heart beat sped up and he sat up straight.

Chris glanced at him, "Tyler, are you ok."

Tyler gulped. He couldn't run away from his problems anymore.

"stop the car."

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Tyler walked into Josh's hospital room, his face showing no emotion. It had been almost a year since josh had gotten in the car wreck. He had flown through the windshield head first, causing him to go into a death like sleep.

Tyler had only grown worse since the crash. His old ways of cutting had come back and it has been worse than ever. He found ways to cope with the pain that most people didn't agree with.

He got into trouble when he was angry and he slept around with guys when he wanted to get his mind off of things. When he was sad, he got drunk. Kelly was aware of these things, she just couldn't seem to control her son.

Madison and him have grown apart, for Tyler was really never home. Most of his friends that were seniors were graduated and moved on to college. The only one who has graduated and stuck around was Brendon. He couldn't leave his friend while he was in the hospital, though he was heart broken when Dallon moved away to college.

Hayley still talked to him sometimes, but she liked the old Tyler more. Melanie and him got in a huge fight, ending their friendship. But Ryan was still his best friend, despite the things he did. Though tyler had lost friends, he had made new ones. They just happen to fall under the wrong crowd of people.

Tyler grabbed Josh's hand, sitting on the chair next to his bed. Tyler ran his fingers through his brown, curly hair. As Josh's hair grew out, the doctors would cut it, leaving it to his natural color. Tyler thought he looked good with his natural hair.

Tyler smiled weakly, "hey, josh. Sorry I haven't got to see you this week."

As usual there was know response.

Tyler sighed, rubbing his eyes tiredly, "I miss you. A lot." Tyler went quiet after that. He bit his lip before leaning and kissing josh on the cheek. Tyler let his lips linger there for a moment before pulling away.

Tyler watched as he slept peacefully. It was almost as if he actually were dead, and that scared Tyler. The only things that gave him evidence that josh was still alive was the rise  and fall of his chest and the annoying heart monitor.

Tyler let go of Josh's hand, letting it drop to the side of him with a thump. He stood up with a sigh and made his way for the door. Just as he reached the handle, it opened and Tyler flinched. Brendon looked at him with a smile, "oh, hey, Tyler....I haven't seen you in a while."

Brendon and Tyler didn't talk to often. Tyler tried to keep to himself most of the time, only really talking with Ryan. Tyler looked at his feet and muttered a small 'ya'. Brendon glanced at josh, before giving Tyler a small smile, "the doctors said he's slowly getting better."

Tyler nodded, keeping his eyes to the floor, "I know."

Tyler pushed passed Brendon and Brendon frowned, "I'll see you around, ya?"

Tyler looked back at him and Brendon finally got a good look of his face. He frowned at the sight. Tyler had huge bags and his eyes were full. A permanent frown played his lips and there was no glow to him.

Tyler gulped, "I don't know."

Brendon forced a smile, "oh, ok. Well, it was since seeing you."

Tyler nodded and turned back around. He quickly walked out of the hospital and to his car. He sat there for a moment, just thinking. He hated thinking. Tyler chewed on the sleeve of his sweater, which was really Josh's.

He shook his head and started the ignition. He drove out of the hospital parking lot and onto the road. Tyler turned the radio on, humming along with it quietly. He pulled into the driveway of his house and turned the ignition off. He jogged up the steps and walked into the house.

"Tyler? Is that you?"

Kelly came into the hallway where he was and smiled. Tyler kissed her cheek as he walked passed her. "Hey, mom," he mumbled quietly.

Kelly followed him into the living room, "how's josh doing? Is he getting any better?"

Tyler sat down on the couch, turning the tv on, "the doctors said he slowly progressing. But I don't think they know shit, because that's what they said months again and he's still in a coma."

Kelly frowned, sitting next to her son, "Tyler, it'll take time. He'll get better."

Tyler looked at her with wide eyes, "he's been in that stupid coma for almost a year. I'm tired of people telling me he's going to get better, because the looks of it he's not."

Kelly looked at the TV, not knowing how to reply. Tyler watched the TV with a scowl, letting out a huff. Kelly turned to Tyler again, "Ryan called."

Tyler glanced at Kelly, "what for?"

Kelly gave him a half smile, "he was just checking up on you. He knew you were seeing josh today and wanted to make sure you were ok."

Tyler nodded, turning back to the TV with less of a scowl. Madison walked into the living room and smiled at Kelly, "hey, mom." She looked at Tyler and scowled, "oh, looks like someone finally decided to come home?"

Tyler rolled his eyes, "fuck off."

Kelly snapped at them, "both of you stop. I'm tired of you two arguing."

Madison glared at Tyler, "maybe if he wasn't such an asshole-"

"oh, go screw your self, Madison," Tyler snapped at her. Madison rolled her eyes before walking into the kitchen.

Kelly looked at Tyler sadly, "Tyler..."

Tyler stood up, "don't."

He walked out of the living room and to the front door. He stepped outside and slammed the door shut behind him. His phone vibrated and he took it out of his pocket.

Ryan: hey, wanna come over for a bit?

Tyler: sure.

Tyler pocketed his phone and got in his car. He could always count on Ryan.

I'm really excited for this. Like, at first I was going to end serendipity differently with no sequel but then I got this idea and I was like hell ya that's a much better idea. I literally started working on this right after I finished serendipity. Lol.

I won't always have a song for the chapter, but if I have a song to go along with the chapter, I'll put one up. I hope you enjoyed, have a nice night/day!!!

-JoJo
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