Chapter 35: You don't get to decide what's best for me

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I'm planning on this already being almost the end. Not THE end, but almost the end of the entire book, probably within 10 chapters.

CHAPTER 35: YOU DON'T GET TO DECIDE WHAT'S BEST FOR ME

School was boring as usual. Ryan ackowledged me today, so that's something new. We didn't exactly talk at school, but one step at a time, right? Was it lame that I counted how many times he acknowledged me today? Well probably but I wanted to keep track of this progress.

And it was progress. When just a few days ago he had not even bothered to look my way. The only time he had really looked at me was when I was crying my eyes out or when I looked at him first. When someone looks at you, you can't help but turn, and that is exactly what happened with us at school.

"Beth, honeeeey!"

My mom was calling me down, but I was lying in my bed while staring at the ceiling, wondering what the heck was running through Ryan's mind. But I called back to her. "Coming!"

I groaned and rocked my body until I was up. Yes, very lazy indeed. When I reached the bottom of the stairs, I saw my mom holding a casserole dish. "Why are you holding that?"

"I need you to take this to Barb's house."

I laughed a laugh that wasn't a laugh."Yeah, mom, okay..uh how do I put this nicely? I can't."

She laughed. "Honey, you just need to drop it off. I'm not asking you to go talk to Ryan. Please, for your old mother."

I groaned out loud so she would know what a sacrifice I was making. Or at least I wanted to make it seem like it was. Of course, I actually did want to go see Ryan, and this was my excuse. Nonetheless, I would have liked for her to come with me. A kind of moral support, ya know?

"You're not old mom."

"Of course not. I don't age sweetie. You might, but I never will."

I laughed at this. Sometimes my mom said these things that lifted my spirits. She handed me the casserole dish and I started my trek to his house. I even counted the steps that it took me to get there, but of course with my mind, my thoughts wandered and at the home stretch I lost count. I mentally groaned.

I transferred the weight of the dish onto one hand, so with the other I could knock on the door, but yelling inside made me stop. It sounded like Ryan and Parker. What they were fighting about was beyond me. Being the nosy person I was, I eavesdropped.

"You need to tell her!"

"Shut up Parker! You don't even know what you're talking about!"

"Oh really? Yeah you know what?! That's a fantastic idea! How about you never tell her and she can hate you for the rest of her life!"

Are they talking about me? Because what. is. happening?

"It is NOT that easy!"

"Yeah actually it is! If you don't tell her then I will."

"PARKER!" Ryan's voice literally boomed. It got quiet, and I pressed my ear against the door. I could hear the anger in Ryan's voice. "That is not your place to tell her," he said, his voice deep and authoritative.

I felt a burning sensation on my hand, but ignored it, it felt sort of like a massage. I kept listening in to their conversation.

"You're an idiot."

I screamed at the sudden feeling of being set on fire. Okay...not really, but it did hurt, and I knew it was going to be a bad burn. The door swung open.

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