you know it's shit when you're finally on medication and yet you don't want it. it's shit because i just got out of the icu for suicide and it hasn't even been a day yet and i'm planning my next attempt. it's shit because i'm so terrified of getting better because this, this depression, is all i've known for god knows how long.
i'm so scared because when i get better, what will be left of me? will i be able to write? no, i won't. i won't even be myself anymore i'll just be a shell of everything i used to be and it sucks because i want to be happy and yet . . . and yet when happiness is right in front of me, i want to run so fast and so far that by the time it catches up, i'll be broken all over again.
YOU ARE READING
emotionally
Non-Fictionbasically a book where i write down how i'm feeling, throw in some really shitty poetry here and there and maybe a few songs for the hell of it. [ trigger warning ]
