Butterfly

25. You've Made Me So Proud.

Chapter Twenty-Five: You've Made Me So Proud.

♡ Jessica Washington ♡

My mum died the next day. She died surrounded by her family. The room was crowded, with myself, my dad, Jasmine, Blake, and Joe all crowded into the small room. I don't think that anybody in the room didn't have tears rolling down their cheeks. It was heartbreaking.

It was a quiet, solemn day for everyone. My dad spent it in his room alone, while I contacted the people who knew her to tell them that she has passed away. This made it all seem so real. She's gone. She is really gone.

Now it's the next day, and Jasmine, Joe and Blake are getting ready to leave. Jasmine and Joe have to go back to work, while Blake has school to go to. My dad doesn't bother saying goodbye, he has locked himself in his room since mum died.

"Stay safe, okay? Call me if you want to talk about it," Jasmine says to me, as we stand outside on the street to say our goodbyes.

"I will," I promise Jasmine, who smiles softly at me.

"It's going to turn out okay, don't worry. She lived a happy life, she did what she wanted in life, she died happy," Jasmine assures me, and I nod.

"I know," I reply, smiling at her. Jasmine hugs me tightly, before I say goodbye to Joe and Blake too, before they get into their car. We're not having the funeral for another week or so, since quite a few people who would want to come live abroad, so they need some time to be able to get here.

I watch as their car slowly pulls away from our house and fades into the distance, leaving me stood alone on the path.

And then there is silence. Because of Jasmine, Joe and Blake staying at the house, there has always been a familiar buzz of noise as we all try to go about our every day lives. Unfortunately, now that they've gone, the house is desolate, leaving me alone in my thoughts. Which isn't good, considering the fact that I have been trying to distract myself since it happened.

The silence gives me the chance to work out what I'm thinking. Ever since she died, I've been trying to hold it together, and failing. When she died, I fell straight to the floor, falling apart each second. And this only got worse when I saw my dad. He was worse than me. I think I physically saw his heart shatter into billions of pieces as he heard the news, and it felt like not only had I lost my mum, I'd lost him too.

I haven't seen him since we got home from the hospital, almost as if he died with her. And I have no idea what to do. I promised my mum that I would help him through it, but I'm not sure that I can keep my promise when he won't even look at me. I don't know how the funeral is going to be sorted out, when I have no idea what to do and he won't even make an effort to pretend that he knows what to do.

"You okay?" I hear a quiet voice ask behind me, and I recognise the soft, low voice immediately. River.

"Hey," I say, turning around to face him. He's the first non-family member that I've seen who wasn't there when she died, which almost takes me out of the dreamlike trance that I have been in since it happened, as if we were in our own little world.

"That doesn't answer my question," River comments, hesitating slightly, as if scared that he'll say something wrong. I smile slightly at his comment, trying to make everything normal. I just want everything to be normal. I want my mum to still be alive and I want everyone to be smiling and laughing, I want everything to be happy.